Shattered Bonds
by tricksie
Summary: For Naruto, bringing Sasuke home is like fitting the last piece in the puzzle. It is all he's worked for. But Sasuke has changed in ways Naruto never expected. And Sakura seems to have fallen for him all over again. While those around him change, Naruto still stands by their old Team 7 bond. But will that choice cost him the ones he loves most? Angsty NS.
1. Back for Good

**Chapter 1 - Back for good**

It all happened in a flash. He barely had time to think. Just act.

Naruto was taking a shortcut back through the territories when the woods came alive in front of him. Literally, came alive.

All of a sudden, rogue nins were everywhere. Stepping out from behind the trees, perched on the limbs, rising up out of the ground. And the at the back, behind it all stood Kabuto…but he looked like a snake. And that masked man…. What was his name? Tobi, that's right. He was there too.

He fought and fought. He tore through so many, but they just kept coming. It looked like it was the end for him. He was out of chakra, out-numbered, and he didn't know how he was going to make it—

When suddenly, out of nowhere, Sasuke showed up. He fought off Tobi and Kabuto, and Naruto was able to rally. They fought together, side-by-side. It was brilliant. Just like old times. And at the end of it all, grimy and bloody and exhausted, Naruto asked him to return. No questions asked.

Sasuke had saved him, so Konoha was honor-bound to offer him immunity. Shinobi-code, and all that. But even more, it was an opportunity he couldn't refuse. Sasuke wanted to make a fresh start. He was ready to come home.

Naruto panted at his own storytelling. In the center of the Hokage's office, he hooked his hands in his pockets and bounced on the balls of his feet.

Tsunade peered across her clasped hands at the two boys — really, men now at 17 and 18 — standing on the other side of her desk.

She had the look of someone who didn't quite believe what she was hearing.

But it didn't matter. Naruto had faith in her. The hows and whys were just technicalities. He knew she wouldn't let this opportunity pass to pull Sasuke back into the fold. No matter what she thought of his story.

Because that's all it was. A story.

Naruto promised he'd make it sound good. So he skipped over the part where Sasuke came out of the woods, tired and hungry. Where they shared a meal in silence, and then Sasuke dropped into a deep sleep by the small campfire, leaving Naruto to sit up half the night, watching Sasuke's chest rise and fall. Afraid to sleep because in the morning he'd be gone. And then Naruto would be left alone. Alone with only the lines of hope and reality blurring around him.

At some point in the night, Naruto's forehead dropped to his bent knees. He fell into a deep, dreamless asleep.

The sun was well up when the soft hush of fabric against ground broke the stillness. Naruto blinked at the sound, remembering….

He froze, head still buried in that dark pocket behind his folded arms. He confirmed to himself that last night was real, but now, Sasuke was had probably just left.

Get ready for it, he told himself. The empty campsite, the harsh sunlight, the still-warm spot on the ground where a body had been. _Get ready. Because this was going to hurt…._

Naruto raised his head slowly. Sasuke was still there.

Sasuke moved an arm, trying to find a more comfortable spot. Hair stuck to his cheek and blue circles welled under his eyes. His cheeks were faintly hollow from too much running and too few meals. Half-asleep, Sasuke breathed deeply and blinked. His slow, glassy gaze fell on Naruto.

Naruto stared back. And then he knew, just _knew_ that it was over. Somewhere along the way, the fight had left him.

Without a word, Sasuke rolled over and went back to sleep.

Naruto blinked at him. There was no conversation about missions or vengeance, pain or loss. It was just them. The two of them understanding each other, beneath all their troubles. Naruto laid down on his side as well, his eyes trailing over Sasuke's form to where his ribcage moved gently in the sunlight.

Naruto felt strangely empty. _Was this it then? Was this all there was? Was the search for Sasuke really over, without a whisper of a struggle?_

But a quiet peace was seeping in to the hollow where all that pent up emotion had been. Hope was taking hold. _Maybe…maybe it was really over…. Maybe now he was ready to come home._

Naruto let his eyes close on the soft white glow of Sasuke's shirt. His long lost friend had finally returned….

On the way home, Sasuke confirmed what Naruto already knew. That his lust for vengeance had abandoned him. That he had no more will to go on. He had seen a great many things and experienced more. Revenge and death. Sadness and abandonment. Was his pain any greater? No, it wasn't. They all had a burden to bear.

He didn't know when, but at some point he'd accepted his burden. And realized he didn't want to inflict any more pain. He didn't want to create any more orphans like himself. And Naruto.

So he left his new team and began wandering. He didn't know where he was going or what he was going to do. He stayed away from everyone, shinobi and civilian alike. His eyes made him a liability. There was no safe haven for him.

Until he saw Naruto. Then he knew he'd be safe. If only for a little while.

"Konoha will be a safe haven for you," Naruto said stridently. "I'll make sure it is."

Sasuke shrugged and looked away. Naruto knew he didn't believe him. But Sasuke never turned back. Even after Naruto announced his plan to lie and cover for him, have him returned as a hero, not a prisoner, Sasuke just accepted it and kept going, keeping pace beside him all the way to the gates of Konoha. All the way to Tsunade's office.

Naruto grinned at her slack-jawed surprise at seeing Sasuke come through the door. And he knew it was his moment — he launched right into his tale. He didn't know if she'd bought it or not. He thought it was rather a good one.

Tsunade leaned back, considering them both. Sasuke simply stood a step behind Naruto, awaiting whatever fate was to come. His face was smooth and expressionless. Exhaustion had replaced the hard lines of anger.

If Sasuke was a picture of reserve, then Tsunade was the opposite. She watched Sasuke in silence, her focus sharpening, as if she were weighing scenarios about the rogue nin and possibly determining a punishment. Naruto thought she looked very much like a hawk about to swoop down on its prey. Feeling nervous in the heavy silence, Naruto immediately launched into an explanation of what Sasuke was hoping for and how Konoha was honor-bound to treat him with kindness.

Sasuke had never spoken about any of this. He seemed to have given up, and been willing to accept whatever Konoha had in store for him. But Naruto hadn't. And the more he spoke, the firmer he stood in defense of his friend, until he felt like he was arguing it for himself.

Which was the only way it would work. Because it didn't feel right otherwise.

Naruto was keenly aware that he was dictating the events of Sasuke's life. Hiding his past and shaping his future. For so long it had been the opposite. His life had been governed by Sasuke's actions since the day he left. But having it the other way around left Naruto feeling out-of-balance. Just slightly. He did his best to ignore it by speaking even more stridently for Sasuke's return.

Ultimately, Naruto wanted everything to return to the way it was, as quickly as possible. Sasuke still said nothing, which was all the confirmation Naruto to continue on. So he confidently made his final point that Sasuke should be returned to Konoha _without_ punishment.

Finally, Tsunade folded her hands on the desk and blew out a long, low breath as if she'd come to some decision—

The door flew open with a bang. Their third teammate stood stock-still in the door, cheeks pink, looking windblown. Naruto smiled tenderly. She must have run the whole way.

"Sa-Sasuke?"

Sakura looked to Naruto. He nodded, eyes soft. Naruto understood the twisting knife of joy and pain, surprise and distrust, in seeing him again. She thought she was dreaming. He had too….

But her open expression quickly hardened. Just like Tsunade's. Angry lines creased the corners of her mouth.

Sakura did not gush or welcome him. She did not even move. Instead she read his movements, scanning for weapons, before her eyes darted to Tsunade for confirmation that this was not some sort of trap.

Naruto had a sinking feeling: This wasn't how he planned this happy reunion of teammates.

Naruto realized she was assessing Sasuke like she would any dangerous criminal. They were all well trained, but Sakura had taken on more training after her last encounter with Sasuke. _Dammit, he'd forgotten._ Of course she'd be distrusting. He should have sent a clone to her the moment the returned, explaining everything—

"Sakura," Sasuke said, surprising everyone in the room. He'd barely uttered a full sentence since his return. But now his voice as warm as an embrace. "I am indebted to you. Your strength helped pull me from my hell." He tipped his head slightly. "I am so sorry I attacked you. But I am grateful you came after me. That I was still worth fighting was a lifeline, though you might never know it. Even as children, somehow you always knew…." He stopped, holding back some sudden emotion. "I understand if you can never forgive me. But I will always be grateful to you."

"Sasuke…" Sakura breathed shakily.

Then Sasuke did something even more astonishing. He smiled at her. It was earnest and humbling, as if he knew what he was asking. Of her. Of all of them.

It was Sasuke's first real smile in years, and it wasn't lost on any of them.

Sakura returned a watery smile. A few tears slipped down unchecked. "Sasuke-kun," she said again, more sure of herself.

The three of them stood, unmoving, in an odd-shaped triangle across from Tsunade's desk. Sakura and Sasuke were closer together. They looked at each other, taking in the changes. Nearest the desk, Naruto formed the point of their triangle. And from that vantage he watched the pair, savoring Sakura's restrained happiness.

This was what he wanted, he thought, the warmth of the moment flooding him. He wanted to see his friend happy. Safe. Home.

"I see what you are saying Naruto," Tsunade admitted quietly after several long moments. Naruto shoved his hands in his pocket and cleared his throat.

At the sound, Sasuke tore his gaze away from Sakura. A faint smile still lingered. The change in his face was dramatic, seeming to peel away the years.

Sakura turned as well, but her eyes never left Sasuke. She watched him as if she expected he might disappear. Naruto watched her watching him, and he couldn't miss the rosy glow to her cheeks or the shine in her eyes. Just then she self-consciously curled the soft pink hair back behind her ear.

Naruto blinked. The movement was so small. Childish even. But there was something familiar in it. And some long-dead emotion of his own was resurrecting, responding to it….

His smile fell. That strange, out-of-balance feeling that things were not quite how he expected them to be was creeping back in—

"Uchiha Sasuke," Tsunade said, voice crisp with authority. "I have seen everything I need to. There will need to be a probationary period of course, but if this is what you want, then you three have made a good start."

"Yes, this is what I want," Sasuke said, slowly at first, but with more certainty in each word. "I am ready to return to Konoha. I want to change my life."

Tsunade laid out the different possibilities for his life ahead and Sasuke nodded, accepting them all with equanimity.

Sakura turned suddenly and beamed at Naruto, and that off-kilter feeling melted away. Naruto smiled back, his heart lifting. Between them stood the culmination of all their hopes and dreams. Everything they'd worked for. Sasuke had returned. The three of them were together again. It would be just like it was before. Better, even.

Sasuke was back. For _good_.

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

New story! Yay! NS, as always. This one will have some relationship angst. So get ready for that. Sasuke is a little different as well. Takes place in the Naruto universe, but alternate timeline. Itachi's dead, Sakura has already confessed, but the war is not looming on the horizon. Just an amorphous threat out there. So life in Konoha is relatively peaceful — well, as peaceful as it can be in a shinobi village! :) Hope you like it. Please read and review!


	2. Team Adjustments

**Chapter 2 - Team Adjustments**

After several long months life bumped into a normal routine. Sasuke's change was true and complete. He lived with Naruto for a while before renting an apartment at the end of his probationary period.

If there was any surprise among his old friends that he chose a small simple one-room flat far away from the old Uchiha compound, then no one mentioned it. Privately, Sasuke did confirm to Naruto and Sakura that being so close to those old wounds did make him hurt. But he no longer sought revenge for it. And they both marveled anew at the change in him.

While Sasuke stayed with him, Naruto noticed that Sasuke had become quieter and more thoughtful than he had been before. He meditated. And the sarcastic remarks and competitive zingers that peppered their childhood conversations were gone completely. Sasuke was polite and reserved.

So, to make Sasuke feel more comfortable, Naruto became quieter too. He mirrored Sasuke's behavior, giving him the space he thought he needed.

Naruto dropped hints about going out to train, announcing loudly that he was going out to the forest to run through some kunai drills that they had competed in quite heavily when they were children. But Sasuke never joined him. Most times he never even looked up. Just gave Naruto a quick two-finger wave. Naruto tried not to feel put out. Time, he told himself, time would bring everything back to the way it was.

But even when Sasuke moved out and Naruto was free to lounge around his apartment again, leave drawers open and things a mess, he still didn't feel quite right.

Sakura, to Naruto's great surprise, seemed to be more comfortable with Sasuke than even he was. Talking and listening and understanding in that beautiful straightforward way that she had with all their classmates. Sasuke now was one of them. Respected and worth listening to, not someone to fear or judge. And her treatment of him, Naruto was pleased to see, informed the rest of their friends' behavior. If Sakura thought he was trustworthy, then others did too.

At Sasuke's new apartment, Naruto sat at the little round table in silence, head propped on his hand, and listened as Sakura worked her magic. With his index finger he pushed a discarded chopstick around the table.

Sakura's voice had been a steady hum through dinner, as it was every time they were all together lately. She would recount stories to draw Sasuke out, asking deeper questions than Naruto ever thought to ask, then steer around other topics, keeping everything light and friendly. Naruto had to admit it worked. Sasuke was slowly opening up to her. To them.

Naruto didn't feel left out. Far from it, in fact. Naruto knew she often included him in her stories, even introducing topics that only Naruto knew the whole story of so he would be forced to recount it. Other times, she would just give him a significant look, always encouraging him to jump in.

But he couldn't find the right words. The little anecdotes wouldn't come to him. It just wasn't as easy as when they were kids. And he didn't know why.

Besides, he would always tell himself when his silence stretched out long enough for Sakura to notice, it was better that she do all the talking. She was working so hard to draw Sasuke out, to heal their wounds and incorporate him back into their lives…why interrupt? This was more important for her, after all…this was what she had always wanted. Sasuke had returned. And she was happy….

He sighed deeply and slumped closer to the table.

And, of course, that made him happy. And why shouldn't it? This was his best friend and the one who Sakura loved. They both had gotten what they'd always wanted…right?

But another thought whispered in his mind before he could stop it. _Then why doesn't it feel right?_ And that awful out-of-balance feeling was back again. It was always there these days, no matter how hard he ignored it.

He pushed his head down on the table, too tired to fight it, and told himself just to be happy to listen to their voices.

They stopped talking for a moment to laugh at him. Sakura gently chided him, telling him to go lie down on Sasuke's futon and she'd wake him when it was time to go. Naruto grinned but shook his head, never opening his eyes. He was rewarded with the feeling of Sakura's fingers tousling the back of his hair. He breathed deeply and tipped his head up into her hand. It was enough to soothe his troubled mind. As they continued talking, he drifted off to sleep.

Hours later, he woke up alone on the futon. The dishes were still sitting on the table, and a pre-dawn glow was coming through the windows.

A blanket had been pulled over him, a sure sign that Sakura had seen to his sleeping arrangement. He was pretty sure Sasuke would have left him at the table. His friend might have changed, but not _that _much.

He began clearing the dishes while Sasuke slept. Naruto allowed himself a smile at the thought of Sakura taking care of him last night. But he still looked for flashes of the girl — his old _Sakura-chan_ — the one who was so focused on Sasuke-_kun_, always working hard as a shinobi to catch his eye. Yet she seemed to be gone too.

Just as Sasuke lived this monkish existence compared to the precocious hot-headed ninja he was before he left, Sakura was different now too. She did not blush or preen. She didn't talk about missions or her accomplishments as a shinobi. Instead she talked about civilian life — the hospital and healing techniques.

It was boring stuff, Naruto thought, but when Sakura offered to show Saskue around the hospital the during her lunch shift the next day, Naruto was surprised to hear Sasuke accept her offer.

He rinsed the last plate. When had his two friends changed so much?

He dried it and put it away, then turned back to the quiet, empty room. He couldn't escape the next obvious thought… If they had changed so much, then where did that leave him?

He grabbed his keys and left before any other disconcerting thoughts had a chance to ambush him.

It wasn't until a few weeks later that he discovered the lunch time visit to the hospital had turned into a standing lunch date.

Naruto was coming in from a mission just in time to see them ducking into Ichiraku's. Sakura cupped her hand over her eyes and saw him coming down the lane.

"Naruto! Are you just getting in? Come eat with us! My treat!"

She grinned as he swung away from the team assembled for that mission. She knew him too well. Food always trumped a bed or a shower. Especially when someone else was paying. Sakura held back the curtain flap for him, and ruffled his air as he ducked under her arm. He smiled tiredly up into her face.

Sasuke's greeting was a little more reserved, but that was Sasuke.

Sakura was jovial and talkative as always, and after he'd answered all her questions, he thought he'd settle into the soothing steam of his bowl of ramen.

It was Sasuke however, that surprised him.

He spoke to Sakura like an old friend. More animated than he ever was before. He would have thought that Sakura was a miracle worker had she not whispered that they were having lunch every day when Sasuke got up to fetch them more napkins.

She couldn't have surprised him more had she kicked the stool out from underneath him.

Sakura's eyes were alight with her success. "He's opening up a lot more, don't you think?"

She expected an answer, but all Naruto could muster was a, "Yeah, I guess." Sasuke came back, saving him from having to add more.

They all turned back to their food, but Naruto ate without tasting it.

From then on, he was painfully aware of how far apart they were growing. Sakura might have been pulling Sasuke out of his shell, but the three of them sure as hell weren't growing any closer together.

And when Naruto met up with them after that, he became painfully aware of Sasuke's interests.

Sasuke didn't just talk to Sakura, he seemed to soak her in. He studied her, noticing her hair, her eyes, the lines on her face after a long shift. Sakura, Naruto was pleased to discover, seemed immune to the extra attention. Except for one time he caught her blushing when Sasuke had looked at her a little too long. He was sure they'd both forgotten he was even with them.

If lunches were for the two of them — of course with an open invitation to Naruto, Sakura would always remind him — then dinners were strictly a team affair. A few nights a week, they gathered at Sasuke's house to have what Sakura called a Team Dinner.

But Naruto really didn't see how it was that. It had been months and months since he'd been back, and Naruto wasn't any closer to Sasuke than he was when he crashed into his campsite that first night.

But he wanted them to be a team again too. Maybe even start up missions as soon as Tsunade allowed it. So he bit down his frustration, smiled at Sakura and let her drag him off to Sasuke's.

One night after dinner, unable to stand listening to another long chat (which he never contributed to anyway), Naruto said he would walk home early.

Sakura frowned, but he fibbed about an early meeting with Tsunade. He said he was going to take the long way and enjoy the sunset. Sakura was still not convinced. He could see the question in her eyes, but she didn't press him.

And once he got out into the mild evening air, he realized his lie wasn't a half-bad idea.

He strolled down to the river and mulled their situation.

Naruto didn't know what was wrong with him. He should be happy. Their team was back together. But he felt like they were a team in name only.

That out-of-balance feeling was back, and worse…he felt like the odd man out of their group.

He picked up a stone and skipped it across the river. The water shattered into glassy diamonds

If he were honest with himself, he felt like he did when he was a kid. Never fitting in anywhere.

He scowled and pitched another stone.

But this was _his_ team, he thought. They should all just fit right back together, like before.

He was beginning to wonder if things had changed too much for all of them. They'd grown too far apart. Well, _he_ felt it. He wasn't exactly sure those two felt it, he groused.

Naruto lobbed another stone, but it landed with a ker-plunk in the water, never skipping. He picked up another stone and bounced it in his hand while he thought.

They just weren't acting like a team…. Maybe if they did some of the things they used to do. Drills, simulations, even line up a few low-level missions. Naruto bounced the stone, feeling slightly giddy at the discovery. This was how he'd bring them all back together!

He skipped the stone with everything he had. It bounced across the water until he lost sight of its path in the glimmering reflections of the setting sun.

The next day, he knew where he could find Sasuke. Lunch with Sakura.

And that's where Naruto waited for him. Leaning against the low wall outside the hospital where he'd seen Sasuke wait for her. Standing in that spot, he refused to let his mind wander, imagine that he was Sasuke and that she was coming out all smiles just for him.

She was always smiling, at everyone. It was one of the things he loved about her. But he knew she she _loved_ Sasuke, so he always watched her, trying to interpret her wide smiles whenever he showed up.

Naruto swung a pair of kunai on his finger. He may not have the gift of conversation they had, but Naruto had never communicated with him through words. Always through sparring. That's where they're bond came from. Why hadn't he thought of it before?

Right on time, Sasuke walked up. He nodded at Naruto, then smiled past him as Sakura came out of the hospital building. Naruto watched his expression shift to admiration, and suddenly he felt this wasn't such a great idea.

Sakura didn't seem to notice Sasuke's attention though. "Hi Naruto, want to join us for lunch? I've just got time for a quick bite." The sun was in Sakura's hair, and she looked hopefully into his face. But Naruto cut his eyes to Sasuke.

"Uh, actually I was hoping Sasuke might want to go spar with me instead."

The subtle shift in their expressions told him the answer before either one spoke.

"Naruto," Sasuke said, his black eyes serious, "I…I don't feel like sparring anymore. I know it sounds crazy, but—"

"Nah, it's ok. Maybe some other time." Naruto swiftly pocketed the kunais, trying to hide his sudden blaze of anger. He knew now he shouldn't have interrupted their little "date."

"Naruto, you don't understand." Sasuke looked pained. "I don't feel like doing any of it anymore. Sparring, fighting…. Being a _ninja_."

Sakura nodded sympathetically, but she wasn't surprised. Naruto stared back, slack-jawed, at both of them.

It must be a joke, he decided. "You don't know what you're talking about," Naruto said with a laugh. "You're still getting used to things. Back on your feet. Sakura agrees with me, don'tcha Sakura-chan?"

"Naruto," she said softly, "people change. It's a lot more complicated than that." She moved to touch his arm, but Naruto back stepped out of her reach. His frustration had finally boiled over.

He jabbed a finger at Sasuke. "Is this why you've been so quiet? Talking to her and not me?"

Sasuke sighed. "No. I've just been trying to sort things out. I wasn't keeping anything from you. I don't know what I want to do now. But…I know what I _don't_ want to do."

"We're all like that! Nobody's got everything figured out. C'mon and go out to the training fields with me. We'll just throw at targets. It'll make you feel better—"

But Sasuke shook his head, sadly but firmly. "I think…. I think my days as a shinobi are behind me."

"Then…." Naruto gulped, pink rising in his cheeks, his voice rising with his anger. "Then where does that leave us?!"

"I don't know, I'm still trying to figure it all out—"

"You're trying to figure it out?! There's nothing _to_ figure out! We can't be a team with a shinobi, an Uchiha and," Naruto hesitated for a breath then plunged ahead, "and his girlfriend!"

"Naruto!" Sakura snapped in surprise.

Sasuke rubbed a hand down his face. "I told you he wouldn't take it well," he muttered to Sakura, sounding for the first time like the Sasuke of old.

"If you feel that way, then we can't be a team," Naruto yelled. But the others didn't respond. And the harsh reality set in. His voice dropped to a whisper. "We can't be a team."

Sakura spoke into the awful silence, "Naruto," she began softly, but Naruto cut her off.

"This is what you've been talking about isn't it? Dissolving the team. Only you didn't know how to tell me."

"No Naruto," Sakura said stridently. "It wasn't just about that. But Sasuke's changed. And he wants to change his life too. He doesn't want to hurt anyone else. And I," she glanced at Sasuke, smiling slightly, "I support that."

Naruto shook his head as if he expected as much from her. "You're wrong, Sasuke. Team 7 isn't about hurting anyone else, it's about protecting the ones we love."

"Not for me it wasn't," Sasuke said darkly. Naruto looked up, anger sharp in his clear blue eyes. "I did it for revenge. I had nothing left to protect except you two. And I turned my back when you needed me. And I nearly killed you—" he nodded at Sakura. Sasuke grit his teeth and shook his head of to rid himself of the memory. "No," he rejoined firmly. "I don't want to go through that again. I'll support everything you do, in any way I can, but I can't be a shinobi anymore. I just can't."

Naruto his hands in his pockets. He looked for a moment like he wanted to say something more — something vicious by the way he locked his jaw together – but he didn't. Without a word he turned on his heel and walked away.

"Naruto, stop! You don't know the whole—"

Sasuke put his hand on Sakura's shoulder. "Just give him some time. He'll understand eventually." He sighed, adding quietly, "This is what I was afraid of."

So Sakura just stood and watched him go. He went down the lane, kicking gravel hard, until he turned out of sight. Her shoulders drooped. Sasuke slid off his hand. "Sorry about lunch today."

"It's alright," she sighed. "I have to get back."

He nodded, waved goodbye and headed up the lane in the opposite direction from Naruto. Sakura stood alone in the sun in front of the hospital, watching him go as well. When he was gone, she looked back to the corner where Naruto had angrily turned, half-expecting to see him lurking there. But no familiar mop of hair broke the hard edge of the building. He was gone.

Sakura turned and trudged back to the hospital.

#####

Naruto walked in the direction of his apartment building in a blind anger. He felt betrayed. By both of them. He had felt like something was wrong for a long time now. Well something _was_ wrong. And it was _them_.

Sasuke had ruined everything. He was still running the show, still determining the course of their lives. They all had to work hard to keep up with Sasuke's lust for revenge. Then he left, leaving he and Sakura to search for him for years. And now that he's back…he just wanted to wave his hand and have their team disappear.

And then there was Sakura. Naruto swore softly to himself. He couldn't believe her, of all people— He knew she'd always loved Sasuke, but he didn't think she was capable of this. Dropping everything just for Sasuke. Choosing him….

He balled his hand into a fist. Her betrayal cut the deepest.

He'd thought their team meant more to her. He thought _he_ meant more— They'd worked together for so long, they had such great harmony…. Now the thought of her, throwing it all away for Sasuke, smiling and talking and laughing and—

Images sprang unbidden of Sakura, laughing with her hand on Sasuke's shoulder, then leaning closer, her eyes on his face, her mouth sweet and parted and expectant….

Naruto closed his mind to it and swore again.

He looked up, realizing he was in front of his apartment building. The thought of going in there was unbearable. He needed to be out doing something…. Being a ninja, he thought viciously.

He stood for a moment, chewing his lip and weighing his options, getting angrier and angrier, until he burst out, yelling "Screw 'em!" at the building.

A startled passerby looked over, then hurried on past the angry youth.

"Screw 'em," Naruto repeated softly. "Let 'em have each other. They don't need me, and I don't need them."

He'd made up his mind. He turned on his heel and walked directly to Tsunade's office, letting his anger fuel him.

_They might have given up on shinobi life, but he sure as hell wasn't going to._

* * *

Author's Note: Thanks everyone for the reviews, faves and alerts! Like I said, things will get angsty (for both Sakura and Naruto). But I hope you enjoy! Read and review!


	3. Sakura's Resolve

**Chapter 3 - Sakura's Resolve**

After the disastrous meeting with Naruto, Sakura worked her afternoon shift like a robot. She attended to patients and fulfilled her duties, but in her spare moments she was rehashing her conversation with Naruto and rehearsing her next one. By the time her shift ended she'd found the right words to explain everything to him. Sure of herself, Sakura burst through the doors into the cool Konoha night and set off for his apartment.

But Naruto wasn't there. Sakura hung around for a little while until the fatigue of the workday caught up with her. Then she quietly headed home.

The next morning, she tried again but got no answer.

At lunch, she dropped into Ichiraku's. But old man Teuchi said he hadn't been by. Sakura stifled her disappointment, instead saying she'd hoped to treat him to ramen. Teuchi smiled broadly. "I'll be sure to tell him your looking for him!"

Three days later, she still hadn't seen him.

"Tsunade-sama," Sakura said as she dropped the weekly hospital reports in the basket on her desk. "Um…by any chance, do you know if Naruto is out on a mission" She felt a little foolish asking about her own teammate, but desperation won out.

Tsunade leveled her penetrating gaze at Sakura. "I would think you would know that above all people."

"Yes, well…. I've been looking for him, but I can't seem to find him."

"Ahh," Tsunade said, clasping her fingers together. "Problems already? Let me guess, this has something to do with your _other_ teammate." Her red lips curved into a knowing smile.

Sakura's cheeks went pink. "It's not like that at all," she stammered. "Sasuke and I have been spending time together, _talking_, but nothing more. He's going through a lot right now and I wanted to explain that to Naruto. But now I think he's mad about it."

"Yes, well, that does explain some of it then."

"Explain what?"

"Why Naruto asked me for a mission out of the blue—"

"He did?! And you gave it to him?!"

"Of course! He wanted to go, and I know better than to let him stand around stewing! Best to let him work off his stress."

Sakura slapped her hand to her forehead. She knew his stress wasn't the type that needed to be worked off. He needed explanations.

"Anything you want to share, Sakura?"

"Uh, no Tsunade-sama. Probably best not to say anything…yet. I don't want to cause any more misunderstandings."

"Ah. Then would it help if I told you I'd already spoken to Sasuke about his request to leave active service?"

Sakura's eyes went wide. "Oh! You have? I didn't even know if it was possible. And Naruto was so upset when Sasuke refused to spar with him." She shook her head. "It was just a mess."

"So you support Sasuke in his bid to 'retire' as a shinobi?"

"Of course! I'd support him in anything he wanted to do."

Tsunade looked at her sharply. "I see." She straightened a stack of papers on her desk that didn't need straightening. When she spoke again her attitude was crisp. "And you would 'support' him no matter what his next assigned duty might be?"

"Yes, of course," Sakura said with confusion. "Why wouldn't I?"

"Even if he left the village?"

Sakura frowned. "Being a team goes beyond mission assignments. I would do whatever was required to support him, as a friend and because it's my duty," she said resolutely. "And so would Naruto."

Tsunade looked at her skeptically. Sakura frowned, feeling like she hadn't said the right thing.

"I think" Sakura haltingly clarified, "Naruto's misunderstood everything. Sasuke isn't leaving us, but he can't go on with his life as it was before. I know Naruto's hurt, but if I could only explain it to him—"

"And you could do this because you're so close to Sasuke now?" Tsunade quipped dryly.

"No," Sakura said with a small smile, finally understanding. Tsunade was especially protective of Naruto, above all others. "I could explain it because I know _Naruto_ so well. He was mad and wouldn't listen. And by the time I got off shift, I guess he was already out of the village." Sakura shook her head at the ridiculousness of it all. "Baka," she laughed.

The tightness in Tsunade's expression softened. She pulled the hospital report from the basket, letting it unfurl in front of her. "He'll be back tomorrow night. It was only a quick delivery across the territories." Tsunade's eyes flashed at Sakura over the top of the scroll. The corners crinkled as if she were hiding a smile. "Just far enough to get him out of my hair for a few days."

Sakura grinned. "Thank you Tsunade-sama."

* * *

Sakura dashed up the stairs, taking them two at a time. She had gotten off late from her hospital shift, but it didn't matter. After two weeks of near misses, she didn't mind being late. Perhaps this time she'd catch him.

No matter where or when she thought she'd find Naruto, no matter how hard she tried, she missed him. It was like he didn't want to be found.

She jogged down the open corridor to his doorway. It was so nice to be out of the hospital and finally doing something that she'd run all the way there. Sakura felt like she'd spent the day tapping her foot or chewing her lip, wishing the arms on the clock would move faster so she could get exactly to this spot.

Sakura smiled up at the peeling wood of the old door and wiped the sweat-tipped bangs from her forehead.

Tap, tap, tap.

"_Naruto? Are you home?"_

Thud, thud, thud.

"_Narutoooo? _Tsunade-sama said you got back from your mission tonight! Are you there?_"_

Up on her toes, Sakura stretched her arm over her head and dragged her fingers down the dusty door frame. The spare keys clinked when she bumped them.

She tried the first one, which didn't budge, then the second. It fit neatly into the slot. But she paused.

"Naruto," she said loudly to the closed door. "If you're there, I'm coming in. So if you don't want me to, tell me to stop now…."

When she got no response, she twisted the key. It stuck a little like it always did, but it finally snicked open. She pushed the door back.

Naruto stood with his back to the door, looking out the big picture window on the other side of his sparsely furnished living room. Blue light clung to his edges. The rest of his body was cast in black.

Sakura heaved a sigh, so glad to finally lay eyes on him. A little laugh bubbled up. "Finally…."

Naruto didn't turn. "So Tsunade-sama told you I was back?" His shoulders bounced once in a noiseless snicker.

"Yeah," Sakura breathed, more relieved than ever to hear him teasing her. "I've been trying to catch up with you for weeks." She closed the door behind her.

"Eh, sorry," he muttered, not sounding very sorry.

She dropped the keys on the table and went to stand beside him, looking out at the view of Konoha. The mesh of roads, wires and overlapping rooflines tumbled over each other like toys spilled from a toy box. There were areas of Konoha that were neat and orderly, houses marching in tidy little rows, but Naruto's apartment was not in one of them. That probably suited him just fine, Sakura thought with a secret smile and glanced sideways at him.

Naruto seemed very fixed on some point in the streets in front of them, his brows knit together in thought.

She bit her lip. There was something very appealing about Naruto when he was thoughtful. She didn't know if it was because he usually hid the depth of his feelings and understanding under the jokes and bravado. Or if it was because after pondering a situation, he would then turn to her — and only her — with clear eyes and say the one thing everyone else had been grasping for. And she would be left staring at him, amazed, seeing him anew.

He huffed suddenly, and a circle of steam appeared on the window. Sakura's smile deepened.

Unable to resist, she reached up to tousle his hair. "Watcha thinking about—"

But in one fluid motion Naruto blocked her hand with his forearm and ducked away from her. He folded his arms over his chest and returned to gazing stonily out the window, leaving a larger gap between them.

Sakura slowly lowered her hand, trying not to feel hurt by the slight. She turned back to the view of Konoha, not seeing it at all.

It wasn't hard to guess what was on his mind now.

All her speeches and well-rehearsed scenarios — they would hang out like always, maybe get dinner, then when he was comfortable she would work around to the issue of Sasuke — flew out the window.

Maybe she should just be direct, tell him exactly why she came. Improvise, like he always did. Sakura flattened her hands against her sides, strengthening her resolve.

"Sasuke was worried…worried about _you_, more than anything else. He was worried about how you'd take it." She watched his face, hoping that hearing about his friend's concern might break the ice.

"Yeah, you two decided to end Team 7 and didn't bother to tell me." Naruto laughed, but it was tight and mirthless. "He was real worried about me, wasn't he?"

Sakura's lips pressed into a thin line. Naruto's anger had not diminished one bit. It had just simmered, waiting. She watched him turn from the window and stalk to the table, pocketing his spare keys. He wasn't just mad, he was furious.

"Sasuke wanted to talk to you," she said, "he just didn't know how."

"But he sure knows how to talk to you," Naruto ground out. He slowly paced the room like a caged animal.

"Because I wasn't his sparring partner! I wasn't his _best friend!_" Naruto stopped at that, and Sakura thought she might have gotten through. "He doesn't know what he's doing, and he doesn't want to hurt you. But we can't make him be a shinobi if he doesn't want to."

Naruto shuttered his face and returned to pacing. "If he pulls out, Team 7 is officially done. Over. Finished. Is that what you want?"

"No! Of course not, but—"

"Then why are you taking his side? Why are _you_ giving up on our team?! After everything…_everything_ we've done together. I can't believe you would let it all go, just because he's back."

"Naruto it's not like that! I'm not taking sides! I know Team 7 wouldn't be the same, but it wouldn't be—"

"No. It _would_ be over. If we had our final member back and he left, willingly, then it would be over. Permanently. They've already reassigned Sai. And if Sasuke goes then Team 7 will be a man short. And they won't fill it!" He stalked back to the window and stood rigidly.

"Then let them," she said in exasperation to his back. "I'm not going to keep Sasuke where he doesn't want to be. And the team is just a name. What's important is that we're together."

"Yeah, you and him maybe," Naruto grumbled. "But not _us_, we're not a team."

She pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to remember all those little explanations that had made such good sense just days before.

Sasuke's return had been hard on both of them. Where Naruto had withdrawn, Sakura had been forced to step forward and try to rebuild their old connection to their old teammate. But she had learned more about Sasuke than she ever had as a child, when her crush and his drive for revenge had eclipsed any chance for real friendship.

"People change, Naruto." She stepped forward, moving to put her hand on his shoulder but remembered his refusal of her touch and stopped herself. "And even though it's hard, it can be good too. Unexpected things can come out of it." She smiled, curling her hair behind her ears.

He turned to listen to her, his face a mask of calm. Sakura held his gaze, knowing he needed more of an explanation. She had never known him to give in to anything without a fight.

"Sasuke is a different person than when we were kids. And I've come to see him in a different light than I did before. I wish you'd open up to him a little bit. He's different. Better." Naruto rolled his eyes and turned back to the window.

"It was awful after he left. I know. But now that he's returned, we can't expect everything to be exactly the same as it was before. And I wouldn't want it to be!" She paused, then added softly, "It's funny, I didn't appreciate what I had…until I had to give him up. I realize now what was right in front of me, all along—"

Naruto growled subtly, like he didn't want to hear it. Sakura shut her mouth. Doubt crept in with the stinging memory of Naruto in the snow, his brilliant blue eyes going ice cold, freezing her out.

She smoothed her skirt, pushing the memory from her mind. "Anyway, my point is that people change, and but sometimes it can bring really good things into our lives. If we let it."

Naruto didn't move. Arms folded, feet spread to a near fighting stance, he looked anchored to the floor. She wished she could get him to relax.

"And listen, I really don't think Tsunade wouldn't disband Team 7, just because of Sasuke. I've never heard of teams getting disbanded. So don't worry about that. We'll still be—"

"Oh, you really don't think so?" Naruto shot over his shoulder, sounding sarcastic, which was not like him.

He turned, and there was no warmth in his face. Instead his eyes were dark and accusing. He looked like a hardened shinobi, ready to pounce.

"So that's it then, Sakura? People change," he said, slow and dangerous.

"Yeah, people change," she said, watching him with growing alarm. She had that sinking feeling that no matter what she said, it wasn't going to be the right thing. She grasped again for a better explanation. "I'm different than I was when we were kids, I see things differently and appreciate things a lot more than I ever thought I would, and if I hadn't gone through the bad times I never would have appreciated the good. And Sasuke-kun's the same—"

She hadn't meant to say it. The old childhood nickname It just slipped out in her rambling. But it had an instant impact on Naruto, igniting him.

"_I_ don't change Sakura-_chan." _His voice went gravelly with anger. He thudded his finger to his chest. "_I'm_ still here, and _I_ still want the same things. _I haven't changed._"

"Naruto, that's not what I meant, I—"

"It's the whole reason I was able to bring Sasuke's back, wasn't it? Because _I_ didn't give up! So, no I don't see how I'm supposed to accept that 'people change' and just be happy about losing everything I've ever wanted!"

"Naruto, I—"

"Save it, Sakura. I get it. Things will never be the same. You two have made up your minds. No more Team 7. You two should be happy together." He stormed past her. "I don't want to hear anymore."

"Naruto, you don't understand! Please don't—" he threw the door open and left, "go…."

Sakura stared at the open door feeling hopeless. How had she gotten it so wrong?

The sounds of running children and laughter filtered in through the doorway. She sighed and rubbed her forehead. There was no sense in following him, he was long gone, and with his abilities he could stay hidden as long as he wanted. She'd come back tomorrow and try to explain again. She wouldn't give up.

Sakura's gaze drifted to the empty table. He'd taken the spare keys with him. Sighing, she pulled the door quietly closed behind her, leaving it unlocked.

The next evening she dropped by again. She knocked, but no one came.

She swept her fingers over the door frame, but there was no clink of spare keys. Frowning, she dropped back on her heels and tried the handle. It twisted slowly until it met resistance. Locked.

Sakura blew out a breath and touched her forehead to the door. Well, at least he'd come home last night. That was a good sign.

Staring at the door, inspiration struck her. Sakura dug a pink notepad out of her hip pack and scribbled a note:

_Naruto, I'm sorry about last night. Please come find me when you get in. We'll go get some ramen and I'll explain everything. My treat! ~Sakura_

She paused, pen over paper, then grinned and added _"-chan"_ to the end of her name.

She didn't miss that in his anger he dropped the familiar epithet from her name. And she didn't quite like the way that sounded.

"There," she said to herself. "Just right." She capped her pen and wedged the pink paper in the door jamb. Now, all that was left to do was wait.

* * *

**Author's Notes**

Thanks so much for the reviews, faves, alerts. Glad you're enjoying it! This story is a "what if" Naruto got what he wanted and Sasuke came back. I think Naruto would soon realize he liked the idea of it, but not the reality. And for Sakura, it's a "what if" they returned after her confession but nothing was resolved. Sakura likes Naruto, but Naruto didn't accept it. How would she move on?

This story is different from VitW in that it's shorter and less descriptive, but the up side is that I'll be updating every Friday! So…hurrah for that! (But don't worry, it won't take away from the other stories — updates for Voice in the Wind and Single Step are coming very soon! ;) ) Please read and review!


	4. Growing Pains

**4 - Growing Pains**

Naruto pulled the paper out of the door without reading it and let it fall, face down, onto the table. It was a nice gesture, but he had other things to worry about right now. Growing up, he had often told himself this often when he felt low or lonely or like something was missing from his life. Something big.

Shooting an angry glance at the pink note, he added "people change" to his internal dialogue as a ruthless reminder of why he felt so bad. And why he needed to move on.

He dropped his rucksack on the table, right on top of the note, then pulled out his next mission scroll and flung himself into the chair to read it.

Team 8 again. He skimmed the details. Seemed easy enough. And he got along well with them. Wasn't exactly the same, but….

He sat back in the chair and stared unseeing across the quiet room.

Without effort, his mind slipped down the familiar tracks it had taken over the last few weeks. He couldn't help compare other teams to his own, other solo missions to how different it would have been with his own team…with _them_.

In fact, he found himself thinking about it so much he was thoroughly sick of it. Sick of wondering what Sakura and Sasuke were doing, sick of thinking of them at noon, picturing them eating lunch together.

The thought of them together drove him to activity. Naruto rooted around in his bag for a pencil, even as his mind drifted again.

He knew it was inevitable. They clearly loved each other. And he should be happy for them.

But…he just couldn't bring himself to be.

And he hated himself for feeling that way. These were the people he loved most in the world.

Secretly he wondered if they thought about him as much as he did about them. Naruto even watched for changes in Sasuke's behavior on the rare times he caught a glimpse of him in Konoha's streets. He had wondered darkly if his absence would push Sasuke to seek him out. And he steered clear of Sakura completely. Not that she would notice, he thought unkindly. _People change, _after all.

Naruto dashed off his name at the bottom of the scroll, accepting the mission.

And he was so tired of thinking of Team 7, of Sasuke, and of her…especially of _her…_and the things she'd said and the convenient excuses and that she could just forget about their team so easily and forget about _him_…that he had to stop. He needed a break.

He shoved the scroll and pencil back in the bag, deciding that his apartment was just too quiet, too boring, too "the same." He needed to get out. He needed some new activities in his life.

With renewed resolve, Naruto hoisted up his backpack and headed out the door. He'd get something to eat then drop off the scroll. And while he was there, he'd ask Tsunade to load him up with more missions.

A gust of air from the closing door rippled the edge of the note where it still lay still, face down, on the table.

* * *

Tsunade arched a brow at Naruto, not trusting his careless air. "More assignments with Team 8? Is everything alright Naruto?"

"Yup, everything is just fine," he said firmly, even bouncing on his heels once as if to prove it.

Tsunade, however, did not look convinced.

She knew what was happening within their team. With Sasuke back, the dynamics were sure to shift. But Sakura was certainly spending a lot more time with Sasuke…. Naruto had to see it too….

She laid the scroll down on the desk and narrowed her eyes. "Naruto, I want your opinion on something—"

"Sure," he said with an overly bright smile.

"I'm planning some solo missions for Sasuke," Naruto's smile fell, "of a more diplomatic nature. Do you think he would be open to them?"

Naruto shrugged and jammed his hands in pockets. But his eyes slid away.

"Are _you_ okay with that?"

"Doesn't matter what I think, does it," he said, sounding as if mattered very much. "We're not much of a unit these days anyway."

Tsunade clasped her hands in front of her. "Yes, Sasuke is very much a pacifist now—"

Naruto let out a hollow laugh. "Another thing we don't have in common anymore." He raked a hand through his hair, making it stick out at all ends. "At least they have each other," he muttered bitterly.

Tsunade peered at him, seeing the fine lines of sadness etched into his face, the true pain that smiles or bluster couldn't hide. "So that's what this is about then? Sakura's with him?" She leaned back in her chair. "I have to admit that I'm surprised. Especially after everything that's happened between you two—"

"I don't know," he said, an almost boyish whine creeping into his voice. "She's never said so. But she's with him all the time. So how could she not be?" He fisted the hair at his temple. "I should have known. I feel like such an idiot."

Tsunade didn't stop him. She wouldn't wipe his pain away with a glib, "It'll be fine." Instead, she watched him fling his hands down and walk to the window where he stood, looking out in pained silence.

Tsunade let him. He needed time to figure this out.

After several minutes, he cleared he throat and began again. "I thought that bringing Sasuke back would fix everything. We'd be like a family again. But it's not like that at all." He shoved his hands back into his pockets, letting his arms slump. "Our team is finished," he said, shaking his head in disbelief. "And they don't even care."

Tsunade sighed deeply. Now she knew how to proceed. "Naruto, these things, these _changes_ in life are hard…and even harder for shinobis. Each group goes through this. Some tension or another. Like growing pains."

She was far from maternal, but she'd always had a soft spot for Naruto. He tried so hard in everything…but sometimes your best effort just wasn't enough. She'd lived through that with her own team.

"It seems to me that you three have outgrown the need for a team for the moment," she said firmly. "You each have your own lives and your own goals. Maybe the time is right to step away from a team for a little while, and find out what's important to you and which direction _you_ want to grow."

Naruto glanced back over his shoulder, clearly skeptical. Tsunade's eyes were soft with sympathy. Naruto shrugged half-heartedly and mumbled, "Yeah, I guess," and she was satisfied that he was at least willing to thinking about it.

Tsunade rolled back the assignment scroll. "I have some missions coming up that require a fourth, and I was thinking of send an anbu, but you would do just as well. They might require you to work with some new shinobis, pick up a few new jutsus or travel a bit more than you're used to. Is that acceptable?"

Naruto turned back to the room, his face smoothing with the prospect of new activities, just as Tsunade hoped it would. He nodded and took a deep, cleansing breath.

"Don't worry about Sakura and Sasuke. It will work itself out," Tsunade added bracingly.

He blew out his breath. "Thanks Baa-chan. I think you're right. A change might be exactly what I need."

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

I know it's short but don't worry, it's the shortest chapter of the rest are between 3-5,000 words. This chapter is about Naruto's pain — next chapter flips back to Sakura. Get ready for more angst! :) Thank sooooo much for all the reviews, faves and alerts! Please read and review!


	5. Surprising Discovery

**Chapter 5 - Surprising Discovery**

Tsunade looked over her afternoon schedule, wondering if she had time for a break before her last appointment. Dragging her red nail down the list to the last entry — "Sasuke's reassignment" — she saw that it was almost upon her. Whereas Naruto and Kakashi could be relied on to be late, giving her time for a quick tea, Sasuke was unfailing punctual.

She didn't have much use for people like that. But they were good for filling in schedules.

The door quietly slid open. Tsunade frowned at the sound. Was Sasuke early?

But it was Shizune carrying a much needed tray of refreshments. Tsunade was just pushing back from the desk, inhaling the fresh, leafy aroma of hot green tea from the pot and thinking of how Shizune was just the right kind of reliable, that she could always tell just what she needed, when her assistant interrupted, puncturing her good mood.

"Sasuke is on his way up," Shizune said as she poured a cup of tea. Face tipped away, she didn't see Tsunade's small smile of thanks.

"Sakura is with him," she added with quiet gravity.

Tsunade's smile fell.

This wasn't a refreshment. This was a paltry offering to soften the blow of loosing her apprentice.

The tea had suddenly lost its appeal. Tsunade made a low noise of disapproval just as a sharp knock sounded at the door. Sakura's knock.

Concern brimmed in Shizune's eyes as well as sympathy, much to Tsunade's irritation. She slugged back the tea, ignoring Shizune. "Let her in. Let's get this over with."

Taking the tray with her, Shizune pulled back the door to admit a smiling Sakura and a stoic Sasuke.

At the moment, Tsuande had no generosity toward the Uchihas and their implacable nature. It might serve them well on the battlefield, but he had no concern for what upheaval he was about to cause by stealing away her apprentice.

She had developed a real affection for Sakura, much like she felt for Shizune, and that would not soon be replaced.

"Uchiha, Sasuke," Tsunade began, trying to keep the bite out of her voice, "you have petitioned the council for reassignment?" She had to follow formalities.

"Yes," he nodded.

She pulled out a very official looking scroll, festooned with tassels to reinforce that point.

"It is hereby granted from the Konoha High Council. You will be tasked with assisting the anbu, working as a diplomatic liaison to the the five great nations as well as," she sighed, "the territories, provinces, islands and their villages, hidden or otherwise, towns, cities—" She shot a look of exasperation over the top of the scroll. "Oh, you know what this says. It's exactly what we discussed. You can read it yourself." She pitched the document, flying tassels and all, at Sasuke who caught it with the fluidity of a shinobi twice his age, the scroll flipping neatly into his open hand as if a he planned it. His eyes never left Tsunade. His hair didn't even ruffle at the movement.

Sakura smiled faintly at his unintentional display of prowess. Tsunade's scowl deepened. She knew what she had to do next. Even though she hated it.

Tsunade schooled her features and turned her eyes to her apprentice.

"Sakura, there is a position open as a guard, if you would like to apply. It would function like a normal mission, although I cannot guarantee the when you might return. Though that might not be such an issue here…." Her eyes drifted to the teapot, its lid still damp from steam. She didn't like to delve into personal matters. But she felt it was safe to assume…. "Selection of the guard is at the discrepancy of the Hokage, so it is not open to everyone." She sighed. "Sakura, you may accompany him, if that I what you wish."

Tsunade pursed her lips and waited for the answer she didn't want to hear.

This was a knife that cut both ways. Tsunade was so fond of her and hated to lose her. But because she cared, she would not deny her the choice to leave. To choose love. Tsunade knew, more than any of them ever would, how fleeting those chances were.

Sakura smiled, a pretty blush rising in her cheeks. She slanted a look at Sasuke that seemed to communicate something. But Sasuke watched her closely, his dark eyes serious and intense. He had feelings for her, that was clear.

Sakura nodded to him once, curling her hair behind her ears. Sasuke accepted her unspoken decision and turned to look ahead, his face a mask of calm.

Naruto was been right, Tsunade thought with a sigh. Something had rekindled between the old teammates.

"Thank you Tsunade-sama," Sakura said with a deep bow, "but I have to decline."

Tsunade tipped her head to side, lips parted in silent question. Sakura smiled.

"I couldn't leave my responsibilities here, my work, my training…_Naruto_…." She laughed softly at that thought, and Sasuke even broke into a smile for a moment.

Tsunade blinked, not sure what she was hearing. She picked up a pen from her desk and put it down again.

There were not many times she was surprised, and even less when she was wrong. But her apprentice had done just that. _Her_ apprentice. Her brilliant, powerful apprentice — the scrappy child who had become the vessel for all Tsunade could teach, bearing it all and blossoming into the radiant woman before her. The one who, Tsunade had always hoped, would outshine her teacher. She wasn't leaving after all!

Sakura had chosen her village, her duties, her _self_. She would not give up all she had worked for just for love.

Tsunade knew it must have been a hard choice, but her affection for Sakura soared.

Sasuke cleared his throat. "I will accept anbu protection for as long as you deem necessary."

Tsunade looked at him with newfound sympathy. He must have known this was coming. Perhaps he had already asked her, and she declined. But he had accepted her choice. Tsunade was proud of them. Both of them. If there was not love there, then there was certainly respect.

Tsunade unrolled the large scheduling scroll across her desk. The parchment, lined in a grid marking the comings and goings of nins over the weeks and months, flopped over the teapot. Tsunade pulled it the steaming vessel, feeling much better about everything, including the tea.

"Care for some," she asked, holding up the pot. This was cause for celebration after all. But both declined. Tsunade shrugged, poured herself a cup, then drew her finger down the maze of lines and names, dates and places.

"There is an opening for you here." She tapped at an open block on the page. Sasuke leaned forward. "But that's little over a week from now. Is that enough time to—"

Sasuke nodded. "More than enough."

Sakura stepped even with her teammate. "Tsunade-sama, I know Naruto is out…. Will he be back by then?"

Tsunade shifted papers, finding one with a several long lists on them. She drew her finger across one line. "No," she said quietly. "He will not."

Sakura frowned. Sasuke straightened, his face returning to its mask.

"Unfortunately, that is your best time to go for the next month or more," Tsunade said, returning to the scroll. "I'll leave that decision up to you. Get back to me when you—"

"I'll go," Sasuke said, looking straight ahead, eyes fixed resolutely at a point beyond Tsunade's shoulder. "Next week is fine."

Seeing Sakura turn with concern to Sasuke, Tsunade hesitated. They both watched him for a moment, until the emotionless calm of his features broke. He sighed and his shoulders sagged just slightly.

He turned to Sakura, revealing something of his true feelings as his mouth hooked into a frown of frustration…and regret.

"Maybe…. Maybe I could leave him a note," he said quietly to Sakura.

Her face brightened. "That's a great idea," she said quietly back. He nodded, and they turned back to Tsunade with the issue satisfactorily resolved between them.

Sakura smiled, but Sasuke's facade, Tsunade was pleased to notice, did not have the shadow of tension it had when he came in. He was worried about his teammates, she realized, _both_ of them. But now he could move on.

Tsunade's pride surged anew for Sakura, having reached out to this boy who seemed so unreachable.

From under the schedule Tsunade pulled another scroll, a mission contract, and Sasuke stepped forward to read over and sign it.

"Tsunade-sama, I was wondering about something," Sakura asked. "With Sasuke leaving and me at the hospital and Naruto out so much…does this mean— Will you disband our team now? I know it's silly, but—" She laughed, but it was nervous. Sasuke's hand stilled on the contract.

"No," Tsunade answered immediately and Sakura smiled. "Well, actually it's complicated," Tsunade clarified. The corners of Sakura mouth slowly fell.

Tsunade continued. "You are still a team, in _name_. But you cease functioning as a _team_, they way you did when you first came out of academy. Everyone goes their own way, gets assigned individual missions based on their skill set and need." Sasuke's hand resumed writing. "Some members continue their partnership, especially if there's an established harmony. Like Team 10, for instance. So no, there's no formal end to a team. It just…ends…."

Sasuke stood and handed the scroll back to Tsunade. Sakura had grown quiet. This was clearly not the answer she'd hoped for.

Tsunade smiled kindly at her apprentice. "Don't worry. If the team still chooses to work together, then it's still a team. There's no time limit. But teams are not a requirement for after your genin years."

Sakura beamed. That was what she needed to hear. Satisfied, the two made their farewells and left.

Tsunade poured herself another cup of tea and sat down.

Teams were a delicate thing. They could pull and fray irrevocably. Or they could stand the test of time, growing stronger with each passing year. The dynamic on Sakura's team had certainly shifted. But maybe it wasn't as simple as jealousy. Maybe they were growing apart. Or maybe it was a little time away from each other that was needed.

At any rate, the outcome had been positive, for everyone. She was _not _loosing her apprentice. What a pleasant surprise.

Tsunade kicked back in her chair, crossed her ankles at the edge of the desk and savored her tea, thinking that today she was glad to be proved wrong.

* * *

The pink paper stuck to his door fluttered at Naruto as he approached. He sighed and tugged it off without reading it. It crumpled lightly in his hand while he worked his key into the stiff lock.

He was only in the village for a few days. And he really didn't want to think about _her_—

Pushing the door open, Naruto's eyes dropped to a long white envelope on the floor. It glared up at him from the cracked tiles. Naruto recognized Sasuke's firm, dark handwriting in an instant.

He grit his teeth. He didn't want to think _him_ either. Naruto snatched up the letter and slammed the door.

Dropping his pack, Naruto strode purposefully across his apartment to the trash bin, telling himself there was nothing Sasuke could say that would make any difference. The damage was done.

He'd already heard that Sasuke had left town. He was surprised the Sakura hadn't joined him…not that it mattered.

He fisted the letter threateningly over the bin, the edges of the pink note just peeking out beyond his fingers.

But he found he couldn't let go of the letter, let it just drop into the empty metal bin. It felt…wrong. Weak. Like he was hiding from it and that he should be somehow stronger than this. He should be able to read it, feel no pain and move on.

But he couldn't read it. Yet he still couldn't throw it away.

Naruto relaxed his fingers and looked at the envelope. Sasuke's measured bold strokes spelled out his name. Naruto could almost hear Sasuke speaking the words as he read it. But the speaker was someone Naruto no longer knew. And he could not guess what the contents held.

It was probably some paltry explanation, he told himself as he thumbed over the upturned lip of the envelope. But he thought of this new, unknown Sasuke — like the one at the fire, so emptied out, vulnerable and lost — softened his resolve.

Naruto's thumb slipped beneath the edge, slowing peeling it open.

He had no idea what this new Sasuke might want to say to him. Must be something important if he wrote it down and made sure to get it to him, slipped it under his door where he was sure to see it, all _before _he left—

Naruto stopped. The flap was almost all the way open and several pages of folded letter were already edging out.

_What the hell was wrong with him!_ Sasuke still _left_! Whatever was in this letter, it wasn't important enough to hang around and say it to teammate's face!

Naruto crushed the envelope in his fist. But instead of dumping it in the trash were it could torment him the rest of his time off, he stalked to his bedroom to bury it in the first thing he laid eyes on, his dresser. Wrenching back the top drawer, Naruto shoved the envelope and the pink note down into the bottom, beneath the shirts and socks and shorts, where he could forget about it. He skidded the drawer shut with enough force that it rocked the whole dresser.

Stretching his neck, feeling strangely triumphant, Naruto strode back to the kitchen and poured water into the kettle for instant noodles. He pushed all thoughts of Team 7 from his mind. In two days, this would all be just a memory. He'd be out with Team 8 again, for a nice long two-week stretch.

Though their familiarity with each other was sometimes a little too painful, too much of a reminder of what he'd lost, Team 8 was a good fit for him. Kiba was always ready for a fight or a laugh, often both, Shino was quiet but dedicated and loyal, and Hinata was…well _sweet_ was always the word that came to mind. She was sweet, doting on her teammates, encouraging them and soothing their frayed nerves. And her ready acceptance of him smoothed the way for him to join their team. He was really grateful for that.

Team 8 had proved to be a balm when nothing else had, distracting him from the constant heartache that was his own team. His _old_ team.

The kettle whistled, interrupting what was sure to be a downward spiral of thoughts.

He plopped the noodle cup on the counter, ripped open the lid and poured in the water.

No more thoughts of _them_, he told himself. It was time to relax. This was his break and he'd earned it.

* * *

It had been nearly three months since Sasuke left and Sakura still had not seen Naruto. It didn't worry her, though. She had a feeling they were just missing each other.

Sakura was making great strides as a med-nin, but that required she keep a full workload at the hospital, often arriving before dawn and clocking out after dark. Shinobi missions were not much different, with missions often running days and even weeks over their allotted time.

She kept an eye on him through Tsunade's assignment scroll. It wasn't classified information and the scroll was always open on her desk, so Sakura never gave a second thought to searching out the familiar kanji of his name among the scribbled grid of teams and assignments.

These days it was often attached to Team 8's mission roster. But Sakura was pleased, it was a good matchfor his boisterous personality. And it made her rest easier knowing that he was with their friends rather than the few times he tagged along with the anbu squads.

Those missions she had kept a closer ear for the injured reports. Some anbu missions could be brutal. So she was please he had found a fit with Team 8.

Sakura always knew when he was coming home, and she'd drop by his apartment, hoping to catch him. But she was always missing him.

She blamed it on the caprices of schedules — hers and his — oversleeping, even the wind, thinking it could have blown her little notes away.

Her pink notes had become somewhat of a signature thing. She began carrying that little pink pad back when they were still genin and she was just starting her med-nin training. Now on the nurses board, among the fluttering white, yellow and blue notes of the doctors and nurses, Sakura's stood out in a pleasant pale pink. She knew that Naruto would know it was her just by the color of the notes taped to his door.

Never long, she would ask if he was okay, and that she missed seeing him. Maybe he could stop by the hospital when he came in. They'd get ramen.

But he never came.

Whenever Sakura dropped by his apartment, the old notes were always gone, so she knew he must be getting them. But one day she decided that wind or childish pranksters might be stealing them. So she dashed off another note and slid it under the door. But if he saw it or not, she'd never know. He still didn't come.

So it was on a night like any other that Sakura found herself staring at the clock above the nurses stand, tapping her pen against her stack of clipboards piled on the counter and wondering if Naruto was home from his mission yet.

The mission notes on Tsunade's scroll said it was a simple errand into the territories, escorting a dignitary. Dignitaries were very punctual, and assignments revolving around them tended to be very well-planned. And almost never ran late.

Unlike her.

She dragged a hand through her bangs and bit back a sigh just as Ino rounded the corner.

"There," her friend wheezed, dropping her own sizable stack of patients' clipboards on the counter. "I think that's the last of them." She turned back to the clock, squinting tiredly. "Only two…er, _three_ hours after we were supposed to be off. Thanks so much Sakura, I never could have done it without you! I would have been here all night!"

Sakura smiled wearily. "It's no problem."

They grabbed their bags from behind the counter and left together, walking out into the soft Konoha night. The fresh air was rejuvenating after hours of being confined in the hospital.

Talking quietly, they rounded the familiar streets towards their homes. But Sakura did not turn off at her road. Instead she walked on with Ino. Ino smirked, guessing why.

"Going to see Na-ru-to," she said teasingly.

Sakura grinned. "Yeah. I keep missing him when I know he's coming back. But maybe since so I'm late, I'll have better luck."

Ino smiled. "Any word from Sasuke?"

Sakura shook her head. She'd never said too much about it. And Ino wasn't too much of a gossip about her, but she always liked to know the inside scoop from her old friend.

"What has Naruto had to say about it?"

Sakura shook her head again, but this time a frown line creased between her eyebrows. "Well…I haven't actually seen him," she said quietly.

Ino's jaw dropped at this confession. "And Sasuke left like…_months_ ago!"

"He's been busy," Sakura said in quick defense, "and so have I!"

Ino looked skeptical. "I've been busy too, but even _I've_ seen him."

"Really? When?"

Ino scrunched up her nose. "A few weeks ago. He was coming in with Team 8. Kiba, Shino and Hinata's unit. He was pretty chummy with them too." She slanted a look at Sakura as if she should understand what that meant.

Sakura shrugged it off. Ino had a tendency to see things that weren't really there. She swore that Sasuke carried a torch for Sakura when he returned, even after Sakura promised they were just teammates.

"Tsunade-sama's loaded him up with assignments. That's all," Sakura said confidently. "And I think it's good. He hates hanging around with nothing to do. And after Sasuke got back, I think it's been hard on him. Finding Sasuke was his purpose for so long. But if he's happy, then I'm happy for him."

Ino breathed a low "Uh-huh," like she didn't really believe her. Crossing behind her, Ino turned off towards her street. "Well, don't stay out too late looking for him. We've got another long day tomorrow."

"Don't worry _Mom_, I won't," laughed Sakura, and Ino stuck out her tongue before waving goodnight.

Sakura continued on alone through the darkened residential lanes that skirted Konoha's business district. Noise and light from the broad avenue spilled down the side streets, and Sakura turned toward the bustling road to take the quickest route. Even though it was late, the restaurants and bars were still open to patrons. So it wasn't a surprise to hear the occasional hoot of a reveler on the street.

But as she approached, one echoed laughter was achingly familiar.

Sakura heart jumped to her throat when she heard Naruto's voice carry down the darkened lane. There was a spring in her step as she picked up her pace toward the lit intersection. His laughter warmed her, reminding her just how much she had missed him. The excitement of seeing him made her almost giddy.

He was probably just getting in, and she could picture him, tired, dirty, pack still on…but laughing. Happy to be home, and spreading his infectious joy to everyone around him. A smile spread across Sakura's face just thinking about it.

At the corner of the building, in the angled darkness of the narrower lane, Sakura stopped and looked for the sound. Sure enough, a boisterous Naruto was coming down the avenue, pointing out the restaurants to the rest of Team 8. He sent up another belly laugh.

Naruto was clean. Refreshed. Damp hair curled over his collar. He'd even…showered.

Sakura's smile slipped.

He'd been _home_.

Then…he'd seen her note. But he still didn't come.

Sakura's hand somehow found the edge of the building. She gripped it hard. Her feet rooted to the spot. Unable to move, Sakura watched from the shadows as the truth unfolded before her.

Naruto clapped Kiba hard on the shoulder, and they all laughed at some shared joke. Even Hinata seemed to be carried away. Naruto saw her laugh through her her fingers, and delightedly bumped her shoulder with his. She rocked with him, but was clearly flattered.

Sakura almost felt the gentle bump on her shoulder herself, Naruto had done it so often to her. But now, the memory twisted like a knife in her gut.

Naruto pointed to a noodle shop, a new one, and the rest heartily agreed. Swinging the door open, Naruto gallantly held it back with his arm. The rest of the team entered in a line, laughing and chattering. Kiba mock punched him in the gut.

Hinata slipped in last, pausing to smile up at him. There was a delicate blush in her milky cheeks which Sakura had never noticed before. She wasn't sure if Naruto noticed it now. But when he patted her shoulder as he turned in behind her, his hand hand lingered there, sliding down her shoulder blade and brushing her hair with the tips of his fingers.

Sakura didn't remember Naruto ever doing that to her.

The door closed firmly behind him.

Sakura sucked in a ragged breath, as if the air had only just returned to the world. But she didn't move. She simply stared at the door, processing and doubting. Reeling.

He was here in the village. Right in front of her. But he might as well have been in another country.

She thought about going into the restaurant and sitting down, pretending she was so surprised to see him when he was forced to acknowledge her. But she didn't think she could pull it off. The shock of it all was still surging, making her head spin, making her want to laugh _and_ cry.

She pulled back from the corner and leaned against the cold, solid building, thankful for something sturdy when everything around her seem to be turning upside down. She folded her arms, jamming her hands under her elbows to stop them from trembling, and gulped back tears.

She wondered bleakly if she would even see him this trip. A little voice inside answered that she wouldn't. She'd finally seen the truth. He was avoiding her.

More voices of happy diners passed by the mouth of the darkened lane. Sakura wiped her face and pushed away from the wall. She walked quickly back down the way she'd came, spurred on by the fear that she'd be see someone she knew and then she'd have to explain why she was crying in a dark alley.

Walking past sleeping buildings, Sakura briefly thought about going to his apartment and waiting for him. But the thought of him with Hinata squelched it. What if he came home with _her_—

Sakura scrunched up her face, fighting tears. She was heartsick and confused. She just wanted to go home and crawl into her own bed. So that's what decided to do. Tomorrow, she told herself, tomorrow she'd seek him out.

But after her 15-minute shift break with Ino the next afternoon, she changed her mind.

"Did you see catch Naruto last night?" Ino said as she passed a few coins to the man who wheeled his dumpling cart by the hospital every afternoon conveniently at break time.

"Yeah," Sakura said quietly, folding and refolding napkins under the little paper bowl holding the steaming dumplings. She didn't look up. "I see what you mean about him getting 'chummy' with Team 8."

She couldn't bear to say _her_ name. But now she understood what Ino had meant. She felt like such a fool.

When she couldn't avoid it, Sakura finally looked up, but she squinted her eyes, pretending the sun was in them, trying, and failing, to act like it was no big deal.

But Ino's face was full of sympathy, without a trace of the light ridicule she normally traded gossip with.

"Oh Sakura," Ino breathed, and pulled her by the elbow to a nearby bench. "I didn't think anything was going on between them. Honest! I would have told you—"

"I didn't see anything," Sakura said quickly, trying hard not to feel like more of a fool than she already did. She took a calming breath. "I mean, it was just him with Team 8. But Hinata," she dropped her voice a notch, "well, he just was paying a bit of extra attention to her. That's all."

Ino curled her mouth in distaste. "Yeah, she always has had a bit of a thing for him."

"Really?" Sakura peered at her friend, wondering how much she'd missed. "Maybe back when we were kids, but still…?"

Ino shook her head resolutely. "I don't think she ever got over him."

Sakura stared at the park across from the hospital without seeing it. The dumplings sat cooling in her lap, uneaten.

Maybe he had a thing for Hinata too. And maybe that's why…that day, in the snow….when she told him she loved him…. Maybe he just didn't love her back. And she was just too blind to see it.

Tears brimmed in her eyes, but she blinked them quickly away. Fumbling for a napkin, Sakura was surprised when Ino grabbed her hand, squeezing it, and offered her own.

"Thanks," Sakura said in a watery voice.

"Oh, Sakura…." Ino said with dawning understanding. "You… and Naruto…. I didn't know! I thought you always liked…."

Sakura shrugged. "Doesn't matter much now, does it." She dabbed at her eyes, actually feeling a bit better that someone else knew.

Ino squeezed her hand again. "Well he's on break now, right," she chirped with false brightness. "Maybe he'll show up at the hospital and make it right! He's always been a bit of an idiot!"

Sakura slanted her a skeptical look, like they both knew better.

The light in Ino's face faded, replaced by a more familiar jaded look. Her pretty blue eyes narrowed the way they always did when she relayed the juiciest gossip, when the boy or girl got just what he deserved.

"If he doesn't come, at least you'll know he isn't worth the trouble. Just let it go for a while. Don't think about it! He certainly knows the way to your house, doesn't he," Ino quipped. Sakura nodded dismally.

And then their break was over. Sakura dumped the cold, untouched dumplings in the trash.

She didn't feel better, not really, but she took Ino's advice.

Sakura moved through the rest of her day, and the three days after, like a ghost. At the end of her shifts she walked home through the darkened village without seeing it. She did however avoid the broad, bustling avenue, and she swore to never eat at the new noodle shop again, no matter how many rave reviews she heard.

She didn't seek him out.

And he didn't come to her.

The next week, dropping off the hospital reports, Sakura quietly scanned the assignment scroll. Naruto was back out on a mission. That confirmed it. He was avoiding her.

Tsunade must have seen the little frown of pain as she eyed the scroll.

"Is this about Naruto," Tsunade asked, pulling her attention away from the reports she and Shizune were going over.

Sakura looked up in surprise, her despair eclipsed for a moment by the spark of hope that perhaps he'd left a message for her.

But Tsunade snuffed it out.

"He said he got Sasuke's letter, if that's what you're worried about." Her tone was firm, pleased to deliver news that must allay what were surely Sakura's concerns. "Said he saw it a while back, but just forgot to mention it."

Sakura pressed her lips into a line. "Thanks. I didn't know. I, uh, haven't seen him in a while, so…."

Tsunade nodded once, but her attention had already returned to the scroll Shizune was holding. She murmured some soft instructions and Shizune nodded.

Sakura sensed this was an opportunity to escape, dignity intact. She realized talking about her feelings here would only make her look like foolish girl in front of her powerful mentor. Sakura bowed, and Tsunade dismissed her without looking up.

But walking out into the sunlight, with the weight of this knowledge on her, Sakura felt like it really was the end.

The end of her team. The end of her friendship.

She wrapped her arms around her waist, forcing the tears to wait, and turned toward home.

Over the days and weeks that followed, Sakura cycled through a variety of emotions. Sometimes she was angry, and she imagined she'd stake out his apartment and pounce on him when he returned, demanding he explain himself. Sometimes, if she was particularly steamed, she would change the scene to Konoha's gates, where she'd yell at him in front of everyone they knew, and they would support her by frowning disappointedly at him.

Sometimes she imagined writing a long letter to him, like Sasuke did, sliding it under his door and waiting for him to read it. But she didn't want to wait for him anymore. That felt like a prison sentence. She knew now that being in limbo was a terrible place to live.

Other times, she fretted she'd run into Naruto again, laughing with his new team and showing Hinata an extra bit of attention, and she'd have no where to run and hide. She'd just have to bear it.

Those thoughts twisted her stomach and brought tears to her eyes. Sakura wasn't a jealous type. But she'd never imagined seeing Naruto shower his affection on anyone else. It had always been only for her. Just like him. And losing it…well it was like the sun had gone behind the clouds. She couldn't think of her life without him. But maybe she'd have to.

It shouldn't be such a surprise, she told herself to ruthlessly stamp out her blossoming self-pity. He made it clear that snowy day that he wasn't interested in her, though she still couldn't believe it was because of someone else. But maybe he'd had feelings for Hinata all this time.

And though she could not keep herself from peeking at Tsunade's scroll— even as she silently counted down every day he was gone and regretted hoping through every day he was home — she never left another note on his door.

She wouldn't push him if he didn't want to be pushed.

And like Ino said, he knew the way to her house perfectly well.

But she knew it was inevitable that she'd see him again. At some point or on some mission.

And for all her painful daydreams of how it would go down, she settled on the course of action that had the least drama of them all.

Sakura decided that when the inevitable happened, when she saw him again she would do _nothing_. She would say nothing. Instead, she would just pick up as if there had never been any distance between them. They would behave like they always had. Teammates. Nothing more. Just as he had after her snowy confession. She'd just move on.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

Thanks so much for the reviews, faves and alerts! While writing this one, I was thinking about how painful high school/college/work environment breakups can be. Just having to see the same person and interact with them, acting like everything is the same when _everything_ has changed. So I was channeling that into Sakura. Told ya this was going to be angsty! ;) Hope you like it! Please read and review!


	6. On Her Own

**Chapter 6 - On Her Own**

Days turned to weeks, but Sakura kept her vow. She did not leave anymore notes at Naruto's apartment and she did not seek him out. And she tried her hardest not to look at Tsunade's assignment scroll when it was open on her desk. Sakura was afraid the Naruto's name would jump right out at her.

If Tsunade thought it was strange that Sakura sometimes stared very hard at the ceiling, then she didn't mention it.

Sakura told herself than when she saw him again — which, she knew, was inevitable — she would act as if nothing had happened. They would just move on. She didn't think too much about this plan though, because she bleakly assumed it might be months before she laid eyes on him again.

She was wrong.

Not three weeks after she'd slipped her last note under Naruto's door, Naruto himself walked into Tsunade's office.

Sakura was just finishing up her hospital report for the week when he strode through the open door, never bothering to knock or announce himself like anyone else would.

At Tsunade smirk, Sakura looked back over her shoulder and locked eyes with a stunned Naruto. Time seemed to freeze for both of them.

Sakura took in his appearance. She knew him so well she nearly felt the roughness of his sleeve and the tangles of his hair as her eyes traveled over him. She was so glad to finally see him, even after everything. Her look of surprise melted into a tentative smile….

But Naruto's shock did not soften into a welcome. Instead he cut his eyes away and fidgeted with the scroll in his hand. He looked uncomfortable, like he'd rather be anywhere but here.

Sakura's smile froze on her face.

The rest of Team 8 ambled in behind him. By their packs and amount of road dust, they had just returned from a mission.

Hinata, Kiba and Shino made their greetings to Tsunade and Sakura. Even Akamaru whined a "hello."

Sakura's forced her lips to hold the brittle smile. Any doubts she had that Naruto had been avoiding her were washed away.

Not able to escape it now, Naruto's gaze skimmed over her, eyes never meeting hers. He muttered a casual "Hey" before turning his full attention to Tsunade.

"We brought back the mission scroll as soon as we came in, just like you wanted." He stepped forward to hand the scroll to Tsunade, and Sakura wished she didn't notice that he stepped wide around her.

In the past, he would have jostled into her, bumping her shoulder or pretending to fall into her. But now he kept his distance. Since no else seemed to see it, she pretended she didn't either.

Tsunade scanned the scroll, and Naruto swiveled to return to his group. But Tsunade stopped him with a question just as he came even with Sakura.

"Any trouble," she said over the edge of the scroll.

He pivoted, jammed his hands in his pockets and rocked on the balls of his feet. "Nope! None at all!" There was a grin in his voice, but Sakura thought it sounded strained. "Well, if that's all Baa-chan, we'll just head out…."

Naruto started to back away again, when Tsunade's spoke, authority clear in her voice.

"Not so fast, Naruto. I'm glad I to finally get the two of you together in the same room." Sakura looked distinctly uncomfortable at the joke. And by the heavy silence beside her, she guessed Naruto felt the same. Tsunade didn't notice.

"I have a mission to the Sand coming up, specifically to escort their medic-nins back here for training. Sakura, I've already spoken to you about teaching them when they arrive. But they will require an escort from the Sand to the Leaf as well. It's a low-level mission, only for two. Sakura, I naturally thought of you as it will give you a jumpstart on meeting the team you'll be teaching. And Naruto" she turned her eyes to him, "I thought you might like a chance to travel to the Sand again…."

Naruto didn't answer. But Sakura knew this was as good a chance as any to mend their friendship. An easy mission to familiar territory would be just the thing they needed to help them get back to normal.

"Of course," Sakura piped up immediately, sure of herself, "it would be fun. Like old times!" She turned to flash her friendliest smile at Naruto, but his answer was written in the tight lines of his face before he'd spoken a word.

Naruto rubbed a hand over his neck. "Nah, thanks Baa-chan. I'm kind of covered up right now, what with helping out Team 8 and uh…you know solo missions and stuff."

Sakura's cheeks burned. She turned quickly, focusing on a spot on the wall behind Tsunade, struggling to something to say to smooth over this new rejection. "It's okay," she uttered quietly. "It's— It's no big deal."

Tsunade slanted a dry look at Naruto. "And is there a reason why you—"

"Oh no reason," he said, overly bright. "I just feel like I'm finally coming into my own. I'm enjoying branching out, like you said, and, you know, doing my own things."

Tsunade made a "tch" sound at having her reasoning thrown back at her.

Naruto turned his gaze on Sakura, smiling finally, but it held no warmth. She didn't look back.

"Sakura told me a while back that _people change_." He drew out the words, letting them cut deep. "I didn't get it then. But now I think I'm starting to understand."

Sakura's lips parted with a puff of breath. His words stung like a slap.

"See ya 'round, Sakura," Naruto said quietly then retreated to his group without another glance, leaving Sakura staring dumbfounded into space.

She gulped back the tears that stung her eyes, but she wouldn't cry, she told herself. She wouldn't make herself more of a fool than she already had.

Now, Tsunade knew something was wrong.

"Fine then," she snapped, "dismissed," then added, "Sakura, I need a word with you."

Grateful tears welled in Sakura's eyes, finally spilling over in spite of her inner struggle to keep them contained. She didn't move to wipe them. She kept her eyes focused on the wall while she heard the slow shuffling steps leave the room.

Tsunade watched her with concern. The sounds from the door tapered off, but Tsunade hadn't moved. Sakura sensed they still weren't alone—

"Naruto, close the door please," Tsunade said firmly, eyes never leaving Sakura's face.

After a long moment, the door slid closed.

Sakura dropped her head and sucked in a ragged breath that dissolved into a sob. Deeply embarrassed, she wiped her face, but the tears kept coming.

"Tsunade-sama, I'm okay, I just need a moment to…to…." Sakura's voice quavered with another wave of emotion.

"Sakura, I'm sorry. I never would have put you on the spot like that." Sakura looked up to see Tsunade's head tipped with real sympathy, not pity. "I thought there might have been a rift between you three, but I didn't think…."

Sakura nodded her head miserably. "I've tried to reach out to him. I've tried to give him space." She wiped the tears with the back of her hand. "A mission like that would probably have helped. But he just doesn't want to—" Her throat tightened at the memory.

"Well boys can be strange creatures." Tsunade came around to Sakura's side and leaned back on the edge of the desk. "I think bringing Sasuke back was not as easy as he let on. He had built up that friendship so much, that I think it's hard for him to see you two as a couple, and be left out—"

"Sasuke and I aren't a couple!"

"Oh." Tsunade frowned. "Really? I'm sorry, I assumed you were…and I believe Naruto thinks you are."

"Idiot." Sakura rolled her eyes. "Sasuke had a hard time adjusting. A _very_ hard time. And since he decided to end his life as a shinobi, he's had a hard time being around Naruto."

Tsunade nodded but didn't interrupt.

Sakura dried her cheeks. "Naruto wants to spar and talk weapons and training. And Sasuke wants nothing to do with that. I realized that if one of us didn't catch him, he was going to fall through the cracks. And since Naruto couldn't, or _wouldn't_, I did."

Sakura paused, gaze drifting with her train of thought. "But I don't think of Sasuke like that. And I don't think I ever did. Not love." She looked at her shoes. "_Real_ love, I mean."

Tsunade studied her in silence for a moment. "So then what did he mean about 'people change?'"

Sakura gave a dispirited laugh. Her eyes shined with new tears. "_I _told him that. I was trying to explain to him that people changed. That _I_ had changed. That I saw Sasuke from a new perspective. Not affection, not hate. But just as someone who was really lost." Her voice dropped. "And that…well, I see Naruto differently too now because of all this…." Sakura's eyes slid away, embarrassed. "That's what I meant by 'people change.'"

Tsunade nodded sagely. "I see. I think maybe Sasuke's not the only one having a hard time adjusting."

Sakura thought maybe they all were. She toyed with the idea of confessing to Tsunade what had happened in the snow. Her train wreck of a confession when she had foolishly believed Naruto loved her. But now the memory was just another rejection from him. Sakura couldn't bring herself to admit that she'd been so wrong. Not after today.

She always thought Sasuke was the mystery, and that she had Naruto completely figured out. But it seemed she didn't know Naruto at all either. She didn't know what to do….

Tsunade sighed. "I wish I had known, I never would have put you on the spot. But I'll tell you the same thing I told both of them: There is never a replacement for your first team, but sometimes you outgrow it. You stop working well together. And you end up pulling in different directions."

If it was supposed to make Sakura feel better, it wasn't working. She hung her head, looking downright depressed.

Tsunade put a hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry about them. Go in your own direction." She smiled into Sakura's face. "Just give it some time. It will work itself out."

Sakura didn't feel about that advice, but maybe Tsunade was right. Maybe it was time to stand on her own. After all, Naruto had made it clear how he felt about her. And Sasuke had certainly struck off on his own path without feeling guilty. Then why couldn't she?

"Maybe you're right."

Tsunade nodded and swept back around the desk. "There was an additional request made by Sand team, but I didn't bring it up because I thought…. Well, it doesn't matter what I thought." Tsunade unrolled a scroll. "They left an open invitation for you to come early so you could learn some of their techniques."

Sakura tipped her head, considering it.

Tsunade continued. "It would be a much longer time commitment of course. But you'll get to learn how they heal there before coming back here. It will be a much more even trade." Tsunade said. "Three weeks with them in the Sand learning their techniques, then three weeks here where you will teach them." A bemused smile curved her lips. "You'll be learning things that even I don't know!"

Tsunade knew the thought of learning something new, something no one else did, was a big temptation. She knew her well.

"It'll be interesting, at least." Sakura shrugged, considering the prospect. "Maybe even fun," she added. But the more she thought about it, the better she felt, until she was certain this was the path for her. Sakura smiled past the tracks of her tears. "I'll do it," she said firmly.

* * *

**Author's Notes**

Thanks for all the reviews, faves and alerts! Glad you're still enjoying it, even though it's angsty, lol! Also, updated the summary to hopefully give people a better handle on the story. There's no real bad guy or good guy here...but one character does have a little bit more maturing to do... I'll let you guess who that is...! ;) Read and review! And look for updates _very_ soon for A Single Step and A Voice in the Wind! (If you think the angst is bad here, wait till the next chapter of VitW!)


	7. Desert Bloom

**7 - Desert Bloom**

As Konoha's massive gates swung open, a golden spear of afternoon sun slowly expanded out onto the road until it encompassed Sakura's feet. She wiggled her toes in the warm light. This was just a taste of what was to come in the Sand village.

The anbu beside her adjusted his pack without discussion, pausing to fidget with the straps for a moment. It was almost like he was…nervous. Sakura peeked at the eye holes of his milk-white mask, trying to see if she knew him. She didn't. But the lack of wrinkles at his eyes meant he was young, perhaps younger than she was. If so, this might be his first solo mission. That would account for his jitters then—

"See you in a few weeks Haruno-san." The guard at the gate gave her a chipper wave. She couldn't remember his name but she gave waved cheerily back, even as she sighed to herself.

This was all the farewell she was going to get.

The anbu passed through the gates without a backwards glance. Nibbling her lip, Sakura lagged behind then stopped completely at the broad stone pavers where the gates came together for a last look back at her sun-washed village.

She wasn't sure if Naruto was in the village or not. She'd spent the last few weeks trying not to think about him…and here she was, failing miserably again.

It was the first time she was going out on a mission without him in…well, she couldn't remember when….

Sakura's self-pity turned to anger, at herself and at him. He'd certainly been out on plenty of missions without her, hadn't he?

Galvanized against the painful recollections, Sakura resolved for the thousandth time to put it all behind her. Give it some time, like Tsunade said. Move on.

She was sick of repeating it to herself. Now it was time to put action behind those empty words.

Sakura turned on her heel and quick-stepped to meet the waiting anbu agent. They rounded the trail into the forest as the slow groan of closing gates rumbled through the trees around them. They connected with a resounding thud. And then it was silent.

The anbu agent didn't say a word. Instead he let the rhythm of his walk slip into time with hers, just as he was trained. She knew he'd spend the rest of the trip like that, moving like a shadow beside her and letting the sounds of her footfalls cover his.

Sai was originally supposed to accompany her, but he wasn't available. However now that she was on the road, she was grateful. Sai would have peppered her with painful observations and nagging questions, keeping at it until she either answered or slipped up and revealed something she didn't want to.

The silence, the scenery and the promise of new experiences beyond the horizon was a balm to her raw emotions. And the next three days of walking saw her feel steadily better than she had in months.

Sakura didn't know she was tied up in so many knots inside. But past each mile-marker, each landmark, each country border, she felt the tension she'd carried easing and slipping away. And by the time they were standing at the edge of the Wind Country, looking out over the rocky terrain to the sliver of yellow on the horizon that was desert sand, she felt like she could breathe again.

Sakura stretched out her arms to catch the warmth of the sun and tipped her face up to the vast bowl of blue sky above them, and let the air fill her lungs. Up until then, doubt had flickered in the back of her mind about taking this mission. But now, standing in the sun, she knew she'd made the right choice.

The young anbu, antsy about standing in the open for so long, cleared his throat for her to stop dallying. Eyes still closed, Sakura smiled up at the sky then folded her arms and started behaving like a respectable shinobi again.

Hours later they entered the last leg of their journey by venturing down the last steep-walled ravine before the terrain opened up onto the endless waves of sand. And somewhere out there in that vast sea of yellow was the Sand village.

She had no idea where the village was, and Kankuro was suppose to guide them, but he had not met them at their appointed spot. So they continued, traveling until they hit the stone floor of the ravine. She and the anbu had not discussed it, but Sakura knew they would simply go until they could go no further. Kankuro would find them.

But she needn't have worried. Because one of Kankuro's "emissaries" had been trailing them for a while, patiently waiting. And now they were almost in place….

Sakura had the benefit of knowing the sound of Kankuro's puppets from their battle with Sasori. But to the anbu beside her, the incoming rush of clacking hollow bones from the cliff tops above must have sounded like weapons. Which was probably just what Kankuro wanted.

The anbu ducked into his fighting stance and launched at the wild-haired, wild-eyed, multi-armed creature as soon as it landed. Seeing no cause for alarm, Sakura stepped back to watch, a faint smile curving up her lips. The puppet danced around, displaying some new weaponry since Sakura had seen it last, and led the young anbu on a bit of wild goose chase. The agent couldn't lay a finger on the puppet.

But Sakura was pleased to see he was starting to catch on…. A precisely thrown shuriken sliced through the chakra thread attached to an arm, causing the appendage to flail limply at the puppet's side. Finally understanding his opponent, the anbu regrouped and was moving in for the kill when the creature shot straight up into the air, rising like a spirit, and disappeared into the glare of blue sky.

Deep laughter filled the canyon, and Sakura couldn't help but laugh back. Gaze swiveling everywhere at once, the anbu backed towards Sakura and the shelter of the rock wall. His kunai flashed in one hand, but with the other he grabbed Sakura's elbow to drag her to safety. "Sakura-san, it's not safe—"

Sakura didn't move. "Having fun, Kankuro?" Her voice echoed off the canyon walls.

"Immensely," he hooted back, a smile in his voice.

The black silhouette of a body hopped down the rocky cliff. The outline of the puppet pitched and jerked above his back.

Kankuro landed with the solid presence of a human, not the empty-boned nimbleness of the puppet, in the middle of the foot path. He stood and dusted off his shoulders, grinning unashamedly at his prank.

Sakura slipped her arm from the grasp of the protective anbu agent and strode out into the open to greet him. The anbu agent stuck close to her, still wary.

"Kankuro," she called as she walked. "I saw some new additions to Crow, am I right?"

The puppet master, face clear of his characteristic battle makeup, beamed at the praise.

"That you did! Always perceptive, Sakura-san! No wonder Sasori was no match for you!"

It was Sakura's turn to smile with pride.

"But who is this with you? And where is that loud mouth Naruto?"

Sakura's smile dimmed. Just the shock of hearing his name when she wasn't expecting it robbed her of coherent words. But she had to cobble together some kind of answer….

"Naruto couldn't make it this time," she said, blatantly lying. "He had some uh…missions and things."

Kankuro bought it, but when she turned to introduce the anbu agent, she found his eyes had narrowed behind the mask.

Maybe he had sensory skills and had picked up on the spike in temperature that always came when someone lied. Or maybe there was too much hesitation in her voice. Or maybe, her traitorous mind whispered, he knew Naruto better than she did now, and knew he was at home and not out on any mission at all—

"And this," she said overly loud, both to silence the doubts and squelch his suspicions, "is my escort for the journey. An anbu guard who would see me safely to the gates of Suna." His eyes cut between the two shinobi, still wary. "He's here to protect me," Sakura said, exhaling and forcing her tension level down, "and he's doing an excellent job." The anbu jerked his chin at Kankuro, but still did not relax.

Sakura breathed in again, clearing her thoughts. If he sensed her tension, then it wouldn't do any good to tighten up while lying. She just had to come up with a better excuse for Naruto's absence, that was all, and believe in it while she was saying it. After all, she was sure to be asked again.

Sakura refocused. "And this," she threw back her arm with a flourish, "is Kankuro. Puppet master of the Suna and heir to the legacy of Lady Chiyo _and_ Sasori of the Red Sand. He will be leading us to the Sand village."

Kankuro bowed deeply. "At your service."

This placated the anbu agent. Sakura saw his eyes soften, and he bowed in respect. He re-holstered his weapon, but Sakura noticed he left his hand on the grip. He may have caught on to her, but she didn't begrudge that. _He's trained well. He'll make a fine anbu._

Sakura saved Kankuro's life several years ago, as well as Gaara's, and even though she had not been back to the Sand since that time, she knew they had not forgotten that kindness.

Kankuro spoke effusively of his home and relished the opportunity to act as tour guide. Sakura smiled and took it all in, the rolling sand, the location of battles on far-flung horizons, even the shapes and contours of the wind-blown dunes that Kankuro swore guided him home. Sakura just laughed. It all looked the same to her, but then she supposed their leafy forest must be confounding to a desert dweller.

They zig-zagged through the baked sand for hours more, until they crested a dune and skidded down the backside into its shady valley.

Kankuro grinned as they dusted themselves off. "Short-cut. Figured you wouldn't mind a little extra sand."

Sakura grinned back. He was right.

The followed the cool blue gutter of sand as it wound down into the valleys behind other immense dunes, and before Sakura knew it, the dunes were rising up like mountains behind them. Beneath their feet, the gutter was turning solid and expanding into a footpath. Sakura's mouth fell open. She realized they were descending into the Village Hidden into the Sand, and she had no idea. It was completely hidden in the folds of the desert. She was impressed.

Down they went, beneath the waves of sand to the bedrock. They treaded through narrow ravines that left a sliver of blue sky high above them. Sakura was so caught up in tracing the path of a lone bird soaring above — almost certainly a Suna guardian hawk — and marveling at how a whole village could be hidden in plain sight, that she did not see the small squad waiting for them at the end of the ravine.

The anbu cleared his throat and Sakura looked up just as Kankuro hailed them.

"Sister! Come see who I found wandering the desert floor!"

Human forms peeled away from the rock wall. They were Sand shinobi guarding the entrance to their village. On a boulder beside them stepped out Temari the Fan Master. She flashed her weapon, an overly large metal fan that was half as big as she was, then fell into a deceptively casual stance by snapping the fan closed and leaning on it like a walking stick.

That was Temari. Deceptive. Where Kankuro was boisterous, Temari was restrained. Kankuro operated with a four-man army. But Temari had to harness the wind. The element of surprise was a powerful weapon in her arsenal.

She smirked and shook her head by way of a welcome, shivering the spikes of blonde hair that framed the back of her head like the spokes of her fan.

But her mouth dropped into a frown when she saw Sakura's companion.

The anbu registered Temari's interest. His hand drifted toward his kunai.

"Well…. Where's the loud mouth?"

Sakura had forgotten. The Sand people had a direct manner that was like a blast of sand-tinged desert air. Always warm, but mildly abrasive.

Sakura smiled back, glad she'd some time to prepare an answer. "He had missions that conflicted with this one. He sends his apologies and warmest greetings." Sakura bowed, repeating to herself that it was what he would have said…if he were actually speaking to her.

As Sakura straightened, she stole a glance at the anbu. She thought she saw a look of skepticism around his eyes, but in the next glance it was gone and he was focusing on the Sand nins again.

Temari bowed her head back, accepting the Sakura's explanation. And that was the end of it.

Temari bounced off the rock and landed in the path to greet them. The Sand shinobi formed two lines on either side. Sakura was just about to comment that there was no need for such formality, when Temari nodded at Kankuro, and a grin peeked out that betrayed some secret communication between the two. Sakura decided it would be rude to ask about the private messages of foreign shinobi _and_ siblings. And Temari fell back without a word to flank the other side of the anbu agent while they made their way toward the bend in the ravine.

Blue light glowed from the base of the road to the top of the ravine, gilding the edge of the rocks. Sakura guessed the entrance to the village was just ahead.

But she could never have been prepared for the sight that greeted her eyes when the rounded the jagged cliff.

The line of nins led directly into a crowd of people, forming a pathway through smiling, waving Sand citizens. Sakura's hand flew to her mouth when she caught sight of a banner closest to her.

"Welcome Sakura-san!"

She gasped. Tears sprung to her eyes. _This was…. This was for her?_

Temari smiled over at Sakura. Kankuro laughed deeply. "Surprised?!"

"Yes," Sakura breathed, laughing as tears pooled at the corners of her eyes.

They moved slowly down the corridor of shinobi and into the waving crowd. Overwhelmed, the anbu agent moved closer to her, but Sakura kept walking, taking it all in. People waved, old men patted her hand and children shouted her name.

"But…I…. I don't understand…."

Temari laughed over the cheers. "What's to understand? You saved our Kage! Did you think you would just sneak in here and no one would notice? You and Naruto both are heroes here!"

An old woman brushed her knotted fingers down Sakura's forearm, murmuring "thank you" over and over.

They kept moving, and Kankuro laughed at her shoulder. "You'll have to tell Naruto what he missed!"

Sakura cringed at his name, even as shook an outstretched hand. The anbu's eyes darted to her for a moment, but she didn't have time to think about it. The steady waving of arms and shouting of her name drowned everything else.

They continued down the village lanes, weaving through the bulbous shapes of wind-hewn sand buildings. After the first crush, the crowds thinned significantly, but people came out to greet her at every intersection. A few of the shinobi, at Temari's command, stayed with them for crowd control. The anbu agent even relaxed a bit and looked up wide-eyed at the organic architecture so different from Konoha's.

They stopped outside an imposing, round-walled building that Sakura guessed was their Kage's tower.

Temari smiled. "Obviously, Gaara decided to wait for you here."

Sakura fumbled for something to say in astonished gratitude, but Temari wouldn't hear any of it. Instead, she ushered them into the tower and up the curving stairs to the double doors carved out of the sand wall that could only be fit for a Kage.

Without a word, the door slid open on the sand walls, all on their own.

Gaara looked up from reading a scroll. Sakura was pleased to see he looked every part the kage. He was tall and lithe, a testament to his shinobi skills, and his robes swirled around him as he moved in a way his fatigues never did. He looked stately. Like he was comfortable. Like he belonged.

A smile broke across his smooth face. It was as creamy and unblemished as any Sand citizen — a testament to the great paradox that Leaf nins were often more tan than their Sand compatriots because those in the Sand grew up protecting themselves from the harsh desert sun — but his cheeks were no longer gaunt, his eyes no longer haunted by the ghosts of sleeplessness.

His red hair stuck out at all ends, reminding her so forcefully of Naruto's that she wondered if unruly hair was a trait of all jinchurikis. Even the tattooed kanji of "Love" at his forehead had mellowed. It was no longer a bloody curse carved into his skin, but a promise, healed to a soft pink and there to last the test of time.

"Sakura-san," Gaara said warmly as he approached. He took both her hands in greeting, and Sakura bowed over their joined hands.

He let go, and Sakura looked up to find Gaara frowning slightly at the anbu agent.

"But, Naruto did not accompany you?"

Sakura smiled. The lie came much easier this time. "He sends his greetings and his apologies. He had overlapping mission and could not be spared from them. He says he will journey to the Sand the first opportunity he gets."

Gaara nodded. The anbu never shifted his eyes. Sakura felt like she'd passed a hurdle.

From his desk, Gaara picked up a paper-wrapped parcel that sat on the corner and handed it to Sakura.

"With our compliments, Sakura-san. We are honored by your return."

Sakura accepted the soft package automatically, but flushed at Gaara's words. "There is no need for this…. For everything…."

Gaara motioned for her to open it. She gingerly tore back the paper, and her fingers slipped beneath to touch cool silk. Tugging off the string, the slippery fabric unfurled in front of her, and the paper slipped to the floor.

Sakura gasped. It was a remarkable silk robe, in the Sand style, of a dusty rose color that was a few shades darker than her hair.

"See…I told you it would suit her," Kankuro said proudly. Sakura turned in surprise, which Kankuro seemed to expect. "I dress puppets, I know what colors work best—"

Laughter burbled up before she could stop it, but it was echoed by his siblings, until Kankuro could do nothing but shrug and laugh at himself and the notion that dressing puppets was even remotely similar to guessing the preferences of a live woman.

Gaara refocused first. "We hope you enjoy your time here, Sakura-san, and learn the Sand's ancient medical techniques. I feel this alliance will greatly benefit both our villages."

Clutching the robe to her chest, Sakura dipped her head into a respectful bow. "I am honored by the reception and the gift. None of it was necessary. It is my pleasure to be here, and I believe we are forging an unprecedented alliance between our two nations. One I hope will last for generations to come. Thank you, Gaara-sama."

She rose to find him smiling, and thought again about how pleased she was to see the change in him. And how glad she was that she came here.

"Temari and Kankuro will show you to your apartment and introduce you to the medic corps."

Outside the Kage tower, the young anbu took his leave as well. Without a word, he produced his escort scroll for her to sign. Sakura dashed off her name, thinking that if the anbu had detected her white lies, then he was smart enough to let it slide. _Yep, trained very well. He'll do just fine in anbu._ And then, in a blur of hand signs, he was gone.

Sakura's apartment during her stay was a satisfactory set of rooms in a building adjacent to the hospital. She was surprised to discover that the white inner walls dipped and swelled with round shape of the exterior ones, giving the whole place the feeling that it hadn't been built by human hands but instead had simply grown there. The organic shape wasn't for show as it helped buffet it from the building from the ever present desert winds. Round portholes made each room feel light and airy.

Temari pointed to her bedroom and said "You may want to go ahead and slip on your robe now, since we may not be back for a while," and Sakura readily agreed. Kankuro took that as his opportunity to leave.

In her room, Sakura slipped on the robe and admired it in the mirror, allowing herself a moment to girlishly swish the silk around her ankles. Kankuro had good taste, she'd give him that.

The robe was several shades darker than her hair but the color harmonized perfectly. Usually a startling pop of color against her dark Leaf fatigues, Sakura's pink hair was softened by the brownish rose hue of the robe. And once she'd wrapped the shell-pink cowl around her neck, Sakura felt she'd been painted, head to toe, in the colors of a desert sunset.

With her hair and clothes in a seamless palette, Sakura's green eyes fairly glowed back at her in the mirror. Sakura smiled at the irony. She may be dressed like a desert princess in this luxurious garb, but her bright green eyes would always mark her as a child of the Leaf. And this outfit seemed to only make them brighter.

When she finished dressing and was well-acquainted with her living quarters, Sakura and Temari left to visit the hospital classrooms.

"It's late," Temari said as they entered the main doors of the hospital. "They may have already gone home for the day, but at least you'll get a look around."

The interest Sakura had generated upon her arrival had thankfully died down. As the passed through the main corridor and checked in at the front desk, she only received a few polite nods from those who knew who she was. Everyone else went about their business, which was a relief. She didn't like the prospect of sticking out all the time. She wanted to spend her time her learning, not fending off thank-yous and well-wishers.

The woman behind the desk left to get a permanent badge for Sakura, so she took the opportunity to observe her new working environment.

The hospital was remarkably like the one back home. Watching the staff and patients and visitors move by in an endless swarm of activity, Sakura noted that the operational model seemed to be the same as well.

Sakura quickly diagnosed the patients waiting to be seen, then watched them being lead off to different directions of the hospital. She ticked off the classifications in her mind: non-emergency, chronic pain, acute pain, emergency. Sakura also noted the staff wore different colored scrubs that corresponded with their department. All earth tones, just in different shades. She tapped her chin thoughtfully, surprised. Konoha did not require their scrubs to differ or coordinate, but it would definitely be helpful in the event of a village emergency, like when Pein attacked. Maybe they should look into it—

The woman returned and handed over a very official-looking badge with the kanji for her name printed in bold letters stamped beside it with the red seal of the Kage's office. Beneath her name were the words "Guest Instructor."

Sakura took the badge and pinned it to her robe, thinking this was another thing Konoha's hospital did not require. But maybe they should.

She smiled down at it, adjusting it against the material. She didn't think of herself as an instructor at all. More like a Guest _Learner_. Finished fidgeting with the badge, Sakura followed Temari and the woman from the front desk on the tour.

Sakura was surprised to find that the Sand's hospital was nearly identical to Konoha's, in layout and function as well. On her journey there, she indulged in some wild imaginings that she might witness strange injuries and unique Sand therapies for healing…but so far, the diagnoses and treatments were exactly the same they used at home.

She expected the classroom environment to be no different either, and scaled back her expectations to the memory of her first med-nin days, where she put in long hours in windowless rooms, listening to lectures and memorizing what felt like every text book Konoha had ever produced.

They wound up and up through the building, visiting every unit on every floor, until they came to the top of the stairs and chronic care wing. Sakura understood this was for non-emergency patients with long term illnesses and coma patients. In Konoha, this wing was marked only by the whispering of visitors and the squeak of an occasional nurses shoe on the glossy floor. Sakura felt tired just walking down that hall, and she never there if she could help it. Suna's chronic care wing was no different.

Halfway down the corridor, an old door, dented and rusting, stood out among the sterilized ones. It caught Sakura's eye immediately. And sure enough, that was where they were headed. It opened on to a set of stairs, and Sakura wondered if they'd put their med-nin corp in the attic to train, but when her foot landed on the first step, her nose was immediately hit with a familiar smell.

It smelled like…_home…._

Sakura felt like she'd walked into a dream. She breathed in the sweet, moist smell of earth, summer grass and, impossibly, trees. At the top of the stairwell was a door gilded with light, and she drifted toward it breathing in and wondering what trick this was, to smell the pungent tang of the deep woods in the middle of a barren desert.

Their tour guide opened the door and passed through. Momentarily blinded by the glare, Sakura followed the woman and Temari and relied on her other senses. She sniffed again — it was warm and heady and almost musky with growth — and when she crested the last step and stood blinking in the brightness of what must have been a greenhouse, she heard a few gasps. "Is that her?" "She's here!" "Come line up, quickly!"

Sakura blinked and turned in a slow circle, taking it all in. Glass and copper soared up around her to form the dome of a desert greenhouse on the roof of the hospital building. Tables of raised beds nourished plants that Sakura recognized from all over the world. In a enormous terra cotta pot in the center, one of Konoha's own hardwoods stretched valiantly toward the glass ceiling, reaching out its branches to soak up the sun while providing shade for the woodland plants sprouting around its base.

Folded and hanging by rigging from the lowest rim of the dome was an elaborate system of curtains ready to shield the tender plants from too much sun. Ringing the outer edge of the greenhouse were a series of tables scattered with tools any good herbalist might need: jars and labels, scissors and burners, and mortar and pestles of every size.

Eyes wide with amazement at this hidden gem, Sakura swung her gaze back to the clutch of medics assembled in front of the tree. The young men and women were hastily wiping dirt from their hands, straightening their tunics and grinning nervously. They all looked Sakura's age or younger, and were the picture of Sand youth — brown hair, round pale faces and grey eyes.

Sakura learned enough from her her tour to know that their rust-colored robes marked them medics in training. It wasn't a hard system to decipher: the lighter the robe, the lower the rank. Sakura guessed these fresh-faced medics must be close to graduating to the brown robes of the traditional Sand healers. Like the ones she remembered Lady Chiyo wearing years before.

Temari stepped forward. "Sakura Haruno, may I present to you—" She looked down the line again and frowned. "Wait. One's missing. There's only eleven of you—"

Just then a door slammed on the other side of the tree and a rush of footsteps echoed through the now quiet space. Clutching a cactus under one arm, the missing medic hurried into the room with a gust of warm desert air that rippled the fringe of Sakura's hair.

Sakura thought if she were ever a child of the Leaf, then this surely was a child of the Sand.

Tall and striking in the chocolate-brown robes of a full-fledge healer, the medic's auburn hair stood in thick wind-blown tufts. It was close to Sasori or even Gaara's color…only better. Less ominous.

He deftly plunked the cactus onto the table and turned to assist someone shuffling softly in behind him, when he saw the newcomers in the room and stopped completely, eyes locked on Sakura's.

Instead of the stone grey of most Sand native's eyes, his were paler and softer, like the sunset-bleached sky that was at that moment drifting beyond the glass ceiling.

Another set of eyes floated in her memory. Without effort, she decided the color was not even near the blue-green of Naruto's eyes, but then, nothing ever was. He was persistently one-of-a-kind in all things.

Angry at her wayward mind, Sakura quickly banished the thought.

In front of her, the medic was such a perfect mixture of desert colors, she wondered idly if Kankuro had been shopping for him too.

The soft giggle of the other medics and the quiet noise behind him snapped the medic back to the present.

He swirled to take the arm of an old man who was making his way slowly around the tree. Though he was more stooped with age than she remembered, Sakura recognized Lady Chiyo's brother immediately.

She bowed deeply. "Ebizo-sama, I am honored to see you again."

Leaning hard on his cane, he broke into a rusty laugh. "I wondered what had caught Akira's attention. Now I am not surprised." Ebizo dropped down into the lab stool Akira slid out for him and looked Sakura up and down. "You have grown since I last saw you, child. How old are you now?"

"18, Ebizo-sama."

"Ah, same age as our Akira, here." Ebizo patted his arm while Akira flashed a quick, awkward smile. "He is following in my footsteps. Or I should say, we are all following in my sister Chiyo's footsteps."

Sakura bobbed her head. "She leaves a legacy that has touched many people, myself included."

Ebizo nodded deeply, remembering. Temari and Sakura echoed the movement. Chiyo had died giving her life's force so that Gaara may live.

He cleared his throat and his rough voice restarted. "I was not a medic by trade, but when we realized that her _methods_ were being lost, the Kazekage charged me with finding young ones like yourself to carry on her legacy. And that's where Akira came in."

Sakura quirked an eyebrow. "And should I be concerned you are teaching him all of Chiyo's _methods_?"

The medics openly gaped at Sakura's friendly challenge of their elder. Even Akira looked concerned.

But beneath his bushy white eyebrow, Ebizo's eyes glittered with delight. "You always were a sharp one, Sakura-san. Your Slug Princess has taught you well. Now you know things that many have forgotten."

He addressed the room. "Chiyo-sama's specialty was poison." His voice lowered. "Making it…and _using_ it!"

The young medics tittered. Ebizo watched the reactions spread through the room, obviously pleased with himself. With his flair for the dramatic, Sakura decided he was very much like Chiyo and smiled fondly at her memory.

But when she realized Akira's grey eyes were watching her she reined in her smile.

"But killing and healing are merely different sides of the same coin. And Chiyo's knowledge of plants and remedies is unsurpassed. So in our time of peace, we need to sharpen her work for healing our citizens, instead of killing our enemies. And our alliances, especially with the esteemed Leaf, help us do that."

Sakura nodded in agreement.

"Chiyo would be glad to see you here. Sakura-san."

Sakura raised her head quickly to see Ebizo's earnest look. Tears pricked her eyes. "Chiyo-sama and Tsunade-sama are my mentors. It is I who am honored," she said bowing again, this time to hide her sudden emotion.

Ebizo's laughed deeply at their seriousness. "Well, enough of that! Sakura, what do you think of our greenhouse? Were you surprised? Many of our samples should be familiar to you—"

Temari interrupted. "Ebizo-sama, I'm afraid we must be on our way. I will leave Sakura in your capable hands."

"Yes of course," and he swatted Akira's arm for him to bring Sakura over. It was a cue for the rest of the medics to relax as well, and they gathered around the old man to show him what they were working on.

Akira stepped around the raised beds to stand in front of her. He was half-a-head taller, and when he stood this close Sakura had to tip her chin up a little to look at him. She discovered his pale cheeks were tinged pink with embarrassment.

"Hi…uh, I'm Akira," he said, bowing quickly, but half-way down he second guessed what he thought might be the Leaf's customs and stuck his hand out instead.

Unable to respond fast enough to either, Sakura instead pressed her fingers to her lips to smother a giggle. It didn't work.

He stood and flashed an apologetic smile and ran his hand through his hair as if that's what he meant to do.

This only elicited more laughter from her, but Sakura took pity on him. She bowed first, saying "And I'm Sakura." Then when she stood she shook his hand, saying, "But I think we've already been introduced by Ebizo-sama."

Beyond Akira's shoulder Sakura could see the old man keeping an eye on them, a corner of his mouth hitched up in sly laughter.

She smiled, thinking she'd have to watch out for him, when she realized her hand was still in Akira's. He didn't seem to mind. In fact, he was gazing down at her with a sly smirk of his own.

"Is it Ebizo-sama?" Sakura nodded. He laughed and let go of Sakura's hand. She immediately tucked her hair behind her ears while he shoved his hands in the pockets of his robes, but he didn't step away from her. "Watch out for him, he's always up to something. Such a prankster. Was Chiyo-sama that way as well? I didn't know her."

"Yes. Incorrigible," Sakura said with a laugh. "And ferocious. A deadly combination!"

"We're so happy to have you here. It's a real honor."

Sakura colored at the the praise. "I thought I would be working with a shinobi corp, a med-nin unit—"

"You're looking at it," Akira said, throwing his arms out.

"Are you the only one?!"

He smiled warmly. "For right now. They're all take they're final exam next week. I took mine six months ago," he said in a subdued tone.

Sakura raised her eyebrows, not sure if he was bragging.

He shrugged, discomfort clouding his eyes. "I've always wanted to be a medic. All my friends went off to be shinobis, but this is what I love. I eat, live and breathe it. The head doctor wanted me to get my medic certifications a year earlier but Ebizo," he nodded at the laughing old man, "told me to wait. Said that there was more to learn than what was on tests. That's when he brought me up here. He had been thinking forming a med-nin unit for a while, but no one would listen to him. Except Gaara, of course…. So here I am…." His voice trailed off when he realized he might have been rambling.

But a matching enthusiasm bloomed on Sakura's face. "I understand perfectly. I feel the same way. I love being a medic too. In fact, the thought of learning some new techniques was what brought me here early. Though I had no idea about this! It's amazing," she raised her hands and he followed her eyeline around the room only to fix his grey gaze on her face again. "I hope we can learn a lot from one another," she smiled. "Here and in Konoha."

"I hope so too," he said softly. "Come'on. Let me introduce you to everyone."

* * *

**Author's Notes**

Thanks for the reviews, faves and alerts! Not quite a Friday post...it's 12:30 a.m. Saturday morning here. But it's up! Sometimes keeping the Friday update is hard to do!

Had wanted to get some of the Naruto scenes into this chapter, but it just didn't work. Left too many unanswered questions. So I reworked it to save until next time. So the thought I've toyed with in this chapter is that Sakura in the manga never meets up with someone (a guy) who's her equal in the medical field. Someone who shares her enthusiasm and appreciates her. Again, working on the "what if" premise, what if she did? What if she met someone who appreciated her and shared her interests and was a rising star in the medical field. How would that impact her feelings on Naruto (who supports her, but come on, let's face it, really doesn't get her medical side).

(Also, just to save confusion, the anbu is not Naruto in disguise...or even Katsuro! lol ;) Although it would be a cool twist. He'll pop up later though.)


	8. Sakura Haruno, Medic

**Chapter 8 - Sakura Haruno, Medic**

The three weeks in the desert flew by. Sakura's days were packed with learning healing techniques, familiarizing herself with the Sand culture, and generally having a great time with the team of medics.

Coming up in Konoha, most of Sakura's time as Tsunade's apprentice was spent in relative solitude, separate from other young medics her own age. Training under Tsunade to be a med-_nin_, she spent most of the time in the Hokage's tower. But here, there were enough young medics to study and learn as a group. Ebizo demonstrated an age-old healing technique, then they were left to master the task as best as they could. Heads bent over their work stations, they ground herbs into compounds and shared their varying results, smiling at each other's successes and cajoling each other through failures.

Sakura was surprised to discover just how much they relied on plants in the desert. And in such different ways than she was used to. She supposed in Konoha, since plant life was so readily available, she never considered making every little bit count when cooking up a healing salve. The leaves contained the strongest concentration of nutrients, so they only used that.

But in the Sand, no part of the plant went to waste. Leaves, stems, blossoms, even roots — everything was ground and included. A Suna salve might not have the glossy, silky consistency she was used to in Konoha's hospitals, but the grittier balm worked much quicker in speeding healing to the injury.

Sakura was happy to add to the Sand's knowledge of Konoha's plants by showing them some hidden secrets, like slicing open stems to squeeze out the milk for a numbing solution in a pinch, or burning leaves to create toxin-removing smoke in case of poisoning. But mostly, she just observed, marveling inwardly at how talented they were. They were going to make great herbalists, if that was their leaning.

Akira was the sharpest of the group by far, and Sakura understood just after the first day why he had excelled. And why Ebizo had taken him under his wing. Ebizo saw a spark in Akira, a natural curiosity that turned into burning desire to learn more. Sakura reflected that it must have been the same for Tsunade when she chose to accept Sakura as an apprentice. Taking on a student was like nurturing one of the tender shoots under the little glass domes that dotted the tables in the greenhouse. Much care was taken with them because much was expected of them. Akira, like Sakura with Tsunade, worked hard not to disappoint his mentor.

With the deliberate movements of a sharply focused mind, Akira was always trying out new techniques, relying on the wealth of skills he already had at his command and striving for better results. His dove-grey eyes took everything in. Sakura saw in him a thirst for knowledge that mirrored her own.

Shoulder to shoulder, the group learned from Ebizo and each other, building on ancient formulas and creating new ones. They laughed and took notes and worked late into the night, none wanting to leave. It was as if they were all sprouting new growth under that glass-topped greenhouse.

The day before they were scheduled to leave for Konoha, the greenhouse was empty except for Sakura and Akira. The rest of the team was up early, taking their last battery of exams to make them fully fledged medics. Sakura had no doubts each would be awarded the deep brown robes of official Sand healers, like the one Akira already wore. Which, at the moment, had gathered quit a bit of leaves and dirt at the hems.

Akira was slowly walking around the tree, running his hand over the tender tops of the plants as if saying a silent farewell. Sakura busied herself by tidying up the work tables, wiping them down and pushing the scissors and bowls into order at far edges. They would lay idle for the next three weeks while Sakura took the medics back to Konoha with her.

Ebizo would tend the plants — he swore if he didn't that Chiyo was sure to haunt him for it — but he promised to take it easy. Sakura offered many times to heal his stooped back. But he waved her off and continued to shuffle around the greenhouse, head bent of the plants. She felt guilty about leaving him the responsibility of the entire greenhouse, even if he loved it.

Akira came up beside her, sheepishly brushing the leaves off his robe with one hand. With the other he held out a broom.

"It's like you read my mind," Sakura said with a smile.

He bent down with the dust pan. "I had hoped we'd have time to see the shinobi side of your medic skills while you were here."

"Oh there'll be plenty of time for that back home," Sakura said, sweeping bits of dirt and leaves into the pan. "You'll be worn out, and _still_ have to heal. But you'll get to meet all of my friends…." Her voice trailed off. She hadn't thought about it. Not really. But who was there to introduce? The rest of her class, but certainly not her own team. Sasuke was gone. And Naruto….

She swept up the last pile in silence.

"I'm looking forward to meeting them," Akira said. He dumped the pan then tugged the broom out of her hand, interrupting her thoughts. "You miss them, I can tell."

Sakura smiled, determined to sweep the emotion out of her voice. "I'll miss it _here_ when I leave." She shoved her hands in her pockets and walked around the greenhouse, leaving him standing with the broom, watching her. She looked up into the trees branches, tracing them down to the roots. "I've had such a good time. Its been wonderful learning in a big group. I'm sorry to say that it won't be like this at home. There's just me."

"You're more than enough—" he said, and when Sakura laughed he quickly added, "Uh…wait, that came out wrong—"

Sakura waved him off. "I meant all my friends are shinobis. You're really fortunate to have a group like this. I'm afraid your three weeks in Konoha won't be near as much fun as these three weeks have been for me. Less greenhouses. More sweaty bodies and nasty injuries."

Akira smiled warmly. "Doesn't matter, I'm really looking forward to it."

Sakura nibbled her lip. She wished she could say the same. But the image of a frowning Naruto kept storming into her mind.

She'd had three weeks off. Three weeks of relief from thinking about him, worrying about him, hoping she wouldn't run into him…or wishing she would. She wondered if he'd even noticed she was gone, but she quickly banished the thought.

It would be different going back. _She_ would be different, and she would have a whole team of people she was responsible for. But it was funny that just the thought of Naruto had her tied in knots again. She took a breath. She needed to let it go….

"I've been working on some new healing techniques," Sakura said suddenly and turned toward the exit. He must have known she was changing topics, but was too well-mannered to ask why. He just walked in attentive silence beside her. "I mean…not here, but at home," she rambled. "It has to be done on an actual wound on a live patient. It's worked so far, and I'm trying it at deeper levels all the time."

Sakura picked at a fingernail, realizing it was the first time she'd mentioned her pet project to anyone outside of Tsunade and Shizune. No one got it. Funny, she blurted it out to Akira. But he just might understand….

"Um…maybe I'll show it to you when we get back."

"I can't wait to see it," Akira said, giving her a sideways glance that showed he was in earnest. "I'm really looking forward to visiting Konoha."

"Yeah," she said, concentrating on the warmth in Akira's eyes with renewed resolve. "Me too." Things would be different going back home. She'd make sure of it.

* * *

Before dawn the next morning, the medics showed up at the gates wearing brown robes and brilliant grins. They had all passed. Sakura couldn't have been more pleased. It had only been three weeks, but already she felt like she'd known this team for years.

Out on the windswept dunes the Leaf anbu waited for them. Sakura smiled when she saw him, looking at his eyes and remembering his as the same one from last time. He said nothing. He counted the group, pausing for a moment at Akira, who stood closest to Sakura, and giving him an inscrutable look. Then it was gone. He turned his eyes to the rose-tinted horizon, the direction of the Leaf, set off.

Akira glanced at Sakura and shrugged, but Sakura shook her head, dismissing the anbu's actions. When they put some distance between themselves and the grumpy guard, Sakura tipped her head and whispered, "Don't worry about it. Anbu are touchy on the best of days."

He nodded. "Some of the Sand guards are the same way."

They continued on, walking and talking. Conversation spanned a wide range of topics, but most often it drifted back to the one they knew best, the medical field. In spite of the rising sun and increasing heat, Akira spoke excitedly about new discoveries and what the implications could mean for healers. And would the countries that originated the techinques share their knowledge? Did healing have to stay within a country's borders, only to be traded like weapons or commodities. Or was it free to every human, as necessary and uncontainable as the sun or wind? Sakura confessed she often thought about the very same things.

In a lull in the conversation, Sakura turned her eyes to the horizon. She was unexpectedly grateful. She'd never had anyone to share her thoughts with like this. Someone who just _got it_, who understood why she chose to be a medic. It wasn't as second choice or out of pity for the wounded; she truly loved it. And she knew now that wanted to share that love with others like her.

Three weeks in the Sand had opened her eyes to a whole new world of medicine and healing. And it reinforced the need to nail down the techniques she'd been working on. Maybe Akira really could help. And if it worked, she could train others, in _every_ nation….

"I _will_ show some of those techniques I was talking about," she declared suddenly. "When we get to Konoha."

Akira beamed. "Great! I can't wait!"

Sakura grinned back and picked up the threads of the their conversation again. International medical intrigues was an endlessly fascinating subject to her…and helped keep the nagging problem that was Naruto, which was weighing on her more and more the closer they got to Konoha, safely at the back of her mind.

* * *

They arrived at Konoha two nights later. Staring up at the dark gates Sakura was seized by the realization that there would be no welcoming party for their arrival. Of course, she wouldn't expect there to be, but after the Suna citizens treated her so kindly, she felt guilty as she watched the Sand medics' eyes fill up with Konoha's opening gates, knowing that no one was behind it to greet them.

The thought that she might run into Naruto now that she was back home again was also making her seriously jumpy. Sakura sucked in a deep breath, relishing the feeling of Konoha's soft air in her lungs after weeks of dry desert wind, and began to calm down.

She couldn't find Naruto when she wanted to, she told herself. Chances were high she'd go through the next three weeks and not lay eyes on him. She breathed out, equilibrium returning.

The medics looked at the village with wide eyes, the square buildings hinting at their colors, even in the moonlight. Sakura saw her village with new eyes as well. The boxy structures and overlapping angled rooftops were all so different from the Sand's bulbous, wind-carved buildings and muted earthen colors.

Sakura knew it fell to her, and her alone, to make sure they had a good time. No, a _great_ time. She stepped forward from the group and turned around, determined to act as their one-woman welcoming committee.

"Welcome to Konoha, esteemed guests from Suna!" She threw her arms wide and they all laughed. "You have traveled such a long distance to be here, and we are honored by your visit!"

Sakura lead them proudly through the sleeping village. "First I will show you to your living quarters while you'll be with us. The whole top floor of the academy will be your dormitory. Conveniently located close to the hospital of course." She pointed out streets and buildings, knowing they wouldn't remember but enjoying their laughter at she rattled on like an overblown tour guide. "And then we have a fabulous buffet prepared and waiting for you at…." She racked her brain for a restaurant that might even be open at this hour. "Yakini-Q!"

The group revived at the sound of dinner, and they made quick work of dropping off their bags and heading to the restaurant.

The next morning, Sakura showed them more kindness than Tsunade had shown her during her years of training — she let them sleep in. A self-serving gift, to be sure, but when she arrived at the dorm at noon she was happy to see everyone looking well-rested and ready to go.

Sakura took them on a tour of the medical facilities — starting with the chakra-training pond under the Hokage's tower. The idea of testing chakra on live fish wasn't a completely foreign notion to them, however none of them had ever had a chance to try it in the desert. So they spent an hour netting fish, killing them and bringing them back to life just to say they'd done it.

Then it was on to the hospital. Sakura was glad to see they picked up on the layout and hierarchy of Konoha's hospital as quickly as she had done in Suna.

Her first stop was area of the hospital where she primarily worked: the shinobi wing. In the Sand, shinobi and civilian injuries were treated together. But in Konoha, the two wings were separate, and to her knowledge always had been. Shinobi injuries were often gruesome and required special skills. Sometimes even extreme isolation.

Sakura pushed the double doors open and watched as the Sand medics marveled at the steady stream of doctors, nurses and shinobis coming and going. The waiting room had a genin team, a man with a pretty serious burn radiating up his arm, and an oversized white dog with an unusually oversized nose that was red and painfully swollen.

Sakura nodded at the dog's owner, recognizing him as one of the Inuzuka clan. The whining dog must be a relative of Akamaru.

"One of the Aburame clan's test bees got 'em, in training," the Inuzuka grunted, and Sakura nodded understandingly.

"We also treat the shinobi's animal companion," Sakura explained as they left the lobby for the examination rooms, "because their wounds are the same as a human's. A veterinarian wouldn't have the antidote for the sting of poisonous bees from Iwagakure, because they're a guarded ninja weapon and don't live in the wild. But we do," she said, pride in her voice.

They went up a flight of stairs and turned down a corridor with glass-fronted rooms.

"Working on shinobis," Sakura continued as they passed an empty room, "requires a knowledge of the weapons, the wounds, the poisons and the ways they might be inflicted. And then there are the jutsus. And there are thousands of those," she said and smiled as some of the younger Sand medics' eyes went wide.

In the first occupied room, a man was frozen stiff on the bed, glassy eyes fixed on the ceiling. His teammates' faces were ashen, fearing the worst. A young male nurse was readying a blood pressure cuff, thermometer and syringe for a blood test, a standard course of first aid for newly admitted patients, when a female doctor pushed him out of the way.

Sakura dropped her voice a notch and pointed at the window. "You don't focus on the minor injuries if someone is prostrate from a jutsu. That's just wasting precious time."

The doctor flew through a set of hand seals, then cupped her hand over ninja's forehead, and in a flash of chakra-tinged green light, the man's body released. He gasped for air, and his teammates slumped in relief.

The next room had a young man hunched on the edge of the bed. A spate of senbon stuck out at all angles from the back of his fatigues.

Sakura pointed at his back as they walked past. "But you must treat minor injuries seriously. They can cause major problems if not cared for properly."

The boy gripped the bed while the nurse plucked the senbon out, one by one. Leaning against the wall, his young teammates apologized profusely.

They were just moving on when a door flew open down the hall and man on a stretcher was wheeled past at break-neck speed. He had a nasty looking boil on his cheek, purple and angry and ready to pop. "Outta the way," the medic pushing the gurney yelled. Sakura and the rest of the Sand medics had already flattened themselves against the wall to make room.

The stretcher careened down the hall to a room labeled "Toxin-Safe" with a green flashing light above it. The thick door swung closed behind them with a bang, and a lock could be heard clacking into place. A green light flipped to red, and the words "Occupied" glowed ominously on the surface.

Sakura and the medics stepped away from the wall. "And of course, you never pop a poisonous boil out in the open. You could end up wiping out a whole wing." Just then, the room shook with like a bomb went off. The door rattled and soft tremblors radiated through the floor beneath their feet.

Sakura smiled. "Sounds like they got it just in time."

There was a short swoosh of air and a vacuuming sound, then the door opened in a flood of cool, sweet-smelling mist that signified the toxins had been eradicated. The nin's color was returning in spite of the flap of saggy skin on his cheek. But there was no more poison. The red light flipped neatly back to green, awaiting the next patient.

Sakura lead them down the rest of the hall. Most of the rooms were filled with fire-related injuries or vomiting genin. When one of the Sand medics wondered why, Sakura explained that the frequency of injuries had to do with their country's specialty.

"The Leaf has a great deal of fire users and jutsu specialists. So the wounds we most often see, especially in young shinobi who are too foolish to wait for their academy instructor to teach them how to properly use their skills, are fire burns and jutsu sickness. In the Sand, the wounds are more often physical, from weapons, sand blast injuries or poisoning. Hence the need for more powerful healing salves and antidotes. Am I right?" They all nodded, understanding dawning on their faces. All expect Akira who stood in the back with those smiling grey eyes, clearly admiring her.

Sakura thought about how she must look from the outside, explaining everything with the knowledge of someone twice her age, and her cheeks went a little warm. She _did_ know a lot about the hospital and how things worked. And she was always thirsty for more. She supposed that made her something of an expert, although she never really felt that way. But at times like this, her explanations made it clear there was a lot more going on behind those big green eyes than she often let on.

She brushed away the thoughts. "So, all this is great, but this isn't where _I_ work." The medics fell silent, confused, and Sakura smiled at them. "Well, sometimes I do. But there are actually _two _other places where I usually work. Downstairs in shinobi intake, or…well, the other place I'll just have to show you."

They tittered in excitement, and Sakura felt that she was really beginning to love this group. They were all so much like her. Excited about the prospect of more injuries and more healing.

They swept through the street-level intake area, a long wing where the worst of the injuries and those needing immediate care were treated. It was very much like the emergency rooms on the civilian side of the hospital, except the shinobi methods were a little more…_unorthodox_ than the civilian wing. The medic's job was to save shinobi lives, no matter what the cost. Extreme chakra blasts, experimental treatments, fire jutsus to cauterize wounds…nothing was off limits to save a life. If the injury could be identified and treated — _and_ the patient could survive the trip upstairs — then the shinobi was sent up to see a doctor or specialist.

But down here in intake, it was the front lines of healing. Whenever Sakura stepped through those double doors, she felt like she was going into battle. And the enemy was death itself.

They didn't stay on the wing too long today as it was mercifully quiet. Besides, they'd already seen most of the interesting action upstairs. So Sakura took them out to the training fields so they could see her other place of "work."

Late afternoon sun was streaking golden across the green pitch, and she inhaled the sweet scent of cut grass that she had always loved, even though at the moment it evoked images that she knew were off limits to her now. Her team. _Naruto._

She smiled past the painful memories. "This is my other intake wing, operating room, toxin chamber and healing unit." The Sand medics looked at the empty green field in confusion. There was no one there. At the far end was a line of posts, riddled with kunai gouges. But it looked like no one had been there all day. A bird even rested comfortably atop one of the target posts.

Sakura's laughter echoed across the quiet field. The bird's peace disturbed, it flew off towards the forest.

"Well, there's no one here to treat today. But I'm different from other medics in that I go out into the field." A few looked out at the grassy expanse, still uncertain of her meaning. "Not _this_ field," Sakura laughed. "The field of _battle_. I go on missions and heal shinobis immediately after the injury occurs. It ensures a much greater survival rate for the shinobi, and a much higher success rate for the mission."

The medics nodded complacently, and Sakura had a sneaking suspicion that they might not fully grasp what her job entailed. "I'm not with some kind of traveling med-camp, miles away from active fighting. I accompany them, wherever they go. I'm the fourth man…er, _girl_, on the mission."

Some looked impressed. A few looked horrified. Only Akira, standing in the back, arms folded over his chest and nodding seriously, appeared to understand the level of dedication she had for her profession. And how far she was willing to go for it.

A thin Sand nin in the front asked the question the others wanted to know. "And…do they expect _you_ to fight too?"

"No," Sakura matter-of-factly. The medics collectively breathed a sigh of relief. A slow smile curved up Sakura's lips. "But I do anyway."

The medics gasped. Except Akira. He smiled wryly, like he shouldn't be surprised.

"Not everyone is comfortable working with ninjas in the field. I'm one of the few medics in Konoha who is, although I'm working hard to change that. But my background is…." Sakura scuttled the thought. Way too complicated. "Well, that's another story for another time. Anyway I think if you can save a life, it's worth it. So before your time is up here, I want everyone to have real experience with a shinobi team."

A mixture of reactions rippled through the group. Most were excited, but some looked a little pale. Sakura smiled. "Don't be nervous about it. The idea is to find where you're best suited, and do your best work there."

She linked her arm the Sand nin who'd asked the question, and who now looked like he seriously regretted it. "Come'on," she said. "Let's go to the Academy and see what trouble we can stir up, then we'll get some dinner. You'll want to get to bed early tonight. Big day tomorrow!"

Now, some of the medics looked downright nervous at the eager glint in Sakura's green eyes. From the back, Akira grinned broadly.

* * *

The next day, they spent the morning assessing patients as a group. After lunch, Sakura split them into pairs and assigned them to shadow a doctor and nurse to treat patients in the upstairs wings. The types of injuries they would see there would not be life-threatening.

She jerked her head once for Akira to accompany her, and she didn't miss the way his smile brightened when he stepped beside her. A dimple peeked out on his cheek that she hadn't notice before. She ignored it.

"I want to show you technique I told you about," she said quietly as they walked down the hall. "Do you remember it?"

Akira answered so quickly it startled her. "Are you kidding me? It's been eating me alive since you told me about it! I've been trying to guess what it could be!"

Sakura picked up the clipboard of her next patient at the nurse's station, never looking at it, and shot Akira a mock frown. "Sorry, I kept you waiting then!"

He smiled back like a gentleman. "Forgive me, Dr. Haruno." He bowed coyly to her while Sakura laughed. "I defer to your greater knowledge on all things." He tipped back the edge of the clipboard to read the room number and pointed to the end of the hall.

They walked slowly, his gaze on her as she explained the healing technique she was perfecting.

"Well, I haven't told too many people about this. Tsunade and Shizune, but not many others." She shrugged, embarrassed. "I don't know how many people would get it and then be able to pull it off. But I'm working on it."

Akira's steady gaze reminded her of just why she liked him. He was not patronizing or demeaning, and he didn't seem overwhelmed by her ideas. He treated her like Tsunade and Shizune did, with respect.

"So," she tucked the hair behind her ears, feeling strangely shy. "The biggest threat to survival of nins in battle is the healing rate. It's not like with civilian wounds, where you can treat one at a time. With shinobis, they can have several of life-threatening wounds, all working against you. And those accumulated losses always end up killing your patient. There's just too much for their body to fight, as well as handle the strain of giving up extra chakra for healing."

Akira slowed to a stop to listen to her. "I've seen this too, in our hospital. The higher the wound rate, the lower the survival rate. Most nins have less than a 50 percent rate. Although," he lowered his voice as a patient in a robe with a bloody bandage around his head shuffled by, "we're not supposed to tell them that."

"It's actually worse than that. I did a study over several months last year, and it was more like 30 percent."

Akira let out a low whistle. "And you've figured out a way to beat it? But standard chakra healing puts a huge strain on the system. Just reaching the survival threshold requires the patient to give up so much—"

Sakura's lips curved up into a quick, brilliant grin. She _knew_ he'd understand. "Exactly. A standard heal requires too much chakra. But if the medic volunteers their own, heals the deepest wound while channeling the patient's chakra to the surface-level injuries, then as a team the rate of healing raises exponentially!"

Green eyes glittering, she watched Akira work through the variables, the hows and whys and what-ifs that it would take to actually pull it off. Finally, he swiveled his astonished gaze back to her.

"But…who could do that? The chakra control would have to be…extraordinary. _Better_ than extraordinary. It'd have to be…_super-human_!"

Sakura arched an eyebrow. Her lips curled into a saucy smile.

"You?!" He rubbed a hand over his face, and when he pulled it away he was smiling warmly. "I should have known."

"I've been working out the theories testing it," she continued and resumed walking. "And I think I've got the rhythm down, at least enough to teach it. Chakra control can be learned, just like any other shinobi skill. It just takes…determination." She clutched the clipboard to her chest and shrugged lightly, as if it were as easy as that.

Akira chuckled. "That's all?" he said and she laughed too, saying, "Well, maybe there's a little more."

"I haven't tried to teach anyone the technique to anyone," she said. "It's part of my field testing."

He saw the number on the door ahead of them and nodded toward it. The green file folder used for new patients stuck out from the wall rack. "Well," he said, "I've got determination, but not much else. So I'm the perfect student!"

Sakura laughed. That modesty was something she'd come to appreciate about him over the last three weeks. She was fairly sure he was one of the smartest people she'd met in the medic field. But he didn't ever let on. Instead he approached everything as the eternal student. She understood this because she approached everything the same way. Every problem presented opportunities to learn from. That's probably how she stumbled onto her technique

"So," she shifted the clipboard to the crook of her arm, "the trick is to push and pull the chakra at the same time. Yours is pushed to the base of the wound, while the patient's in funneled to the sruface." He gave her a shocked look. She grinned up at him as she reach past and tugged the folder out of the rack. "I know, sounds crazy right. But that's how you start. Push and pull. Give and take."

She flipped open the folder, eyes scanning for the injury. A genin with a kunai gash to the arm and a shuriken wound to the leg. Perfect. She snapped the folder shut. "Come on, I'll show you."

"I can't wait," he said, warmth in his voice, and she knew he meant it.

Smiling, Sakura turned into the doorway to greet her young patient…only to look straight into a pair of fierce blue eyes.

Standing behind the bed on the opposite side of the room, Naruto flicked a dark look past Sakura's shoulder at Akira before folding his arms and settling an icy glare on Sakura herself.

Sakura cleared her throat. "Uh…." She checked the folder again, hoping for one heart-breakingly brief moment she was wrong. But the patient had all the right wounds. She flipped the page. Team 8 team had signed for him.

At the far end of the room, Hinata, Kiba and Shino stood waiting. The 12-year-old boy perched nervously on the edge of the bed. Naruto stood behind him, looking thunderous.

Nope. There was no hope of a mistake. This was her patient. _Crap._

Sakura swallowed hard and plastered on a fake smile. "Hi."

* * *

**Author's Note:**

Life's been crazy-busy and just couldn't keep up the Friday posting schedule the last two weeks. Hopefully, this week will be easier! So this chapter is pretty Sakura-centric — good if you like Sakura! And Naruto returns next chapter! Yay! So this chap explores something I've always wondered about: What if Sakura met another top young medic? Sakura's basically an expert in two fields (medic and ninja), but never see too much interaction on the medic side. Just the shinobi side, which is based on who's more powerful. But what if she met someone who was just as smart, determined, friendly and open as she is? Another medic, who's the top in their field in their own country? How would being recognized for her medic career play out and shape her future choices? Naruto and Sasuke seem to always get recognized for their skills/achievements/crazy chakra abilities/good looks...but what if it was Sakura instead? ;) More to come next chapter!

Thanks for all the reviews and pms! I haven't had time to respond to the ones from last chapter, but just know I read and appreciate every one! Hope you enjoy this chapter too!


	9. Sakura's New Team

**Chapter 9 — Sakura's New Team**

* * *

_From Chapter 8:_

_Sakura flipped open the folder, eyes scanning for the injury. A genin with a kunai gash to the arm and a shuriken wound to the leg. Perfect. She snapped the folder shut. "Come on, I'll show you."_

"_I can't wait," Akira said, warmth in his voice, and she knew he meant it._

_Smiling, Sakura turned into the doorway to greet her young patient…only to look straight into a pair of fierce blue eyes. _

_Standing behind the bed on the opposite side of the room, Naruto flicked a dark look past Sakura's shoulder at Akira before folding his arms and settling an icy glare on Sakura herself._

_Sakura cleared her throat. "Uh…." She checked the folder again, hoping for one heart-breakingly brief moment she was wrong. But the patient had all the right wounds. She flipped the page. Team 8 had signed for him._

_At the far end of the room, Hinata, Kiba and Shino stood waiting. The 12-year-old boy perched nervously on the edge of the bed. Naruto stood behind him, looking thunderous._

_Nope. There was no hope of a mistake. This was her patient. Crap._

_Sakura swallowed hard and plastered on a fake smile. "Hi."_

* * *

"Sakura-san, he was training with us when he was injured." Hinata said politely. "If you're not too busy…."

"No, of course not," she said regrouping. Sakura squared her shoulders and slipped into doctor mode, drawing strength from the professional detachment. "Well, let's get started," she said to Akira.

The injury was on the boy's other side, unfortunately, the side closest to Naruto. Sakura held her breath and walked around the bed, keeping her eyes trained on her patient. Besides, she knew she didn't have to look at Naruto to know where he was. They'd been around each other long enough that she'd know his movements even in the dark.

In the old days, Naruto would have put out a hand to guide her, steady her or just let her know he was there beside her. Sakura used to think it was an extension of their teammate bond. But over time she had grown to wonder if maybe it wasn't just an excuse to touch her, furthering that unspoken connection they had with each other.

But then, maybe she'd been wrong about that too.

Naruto silently stepped back, giving her ample room in the tight space. There was no guiding hand at the small of her back, no warm fingertips grazing her exposed wrist. He leaned away now as if she had some illness that he was trying not to catch.

Well…at least she could be grateful that no one else seemed to notice the silent drama that was going on in front of them.

Sakura patted the propped up pillows and helped the boy lie back and make himself comfortable. Then she unfolded his arm to examine the kunai wound.

Akira moved around the bed to stand beside Sakura for a better look at her technique. "Excuse me buddy," he said genially as he inched past Naruto.

Eyes trained on Sakura, Akira never saw Naruto's dark look as he passed. But when Akira took his place next to Sakura, Naruto immediately stalked to the opposite side of the bed to stand, watching.

Shoulders nearly touching, Akira dipped his head next to hers and Sakura began.

"So, with a wound like this, you apply the chakra here," Sakura pressed green glowing fingers at the top of a jagged kunai tear at the top of the boy's forearm, "and then here." Sakura began methodically moving the green light so that it was pulsing along the wound.

"Ah, I see what you mean." Akira's voice was soft and low, speaking as if there was no one else in the room but her. "It reconnects the muscle below, while staunching the blood at the top. It nearly doubles the healing rate with no measurable side effects on the patient's healing time. And the patient will never realize. It doesn't take such a heavy toll because you are mixing chakras."

She flashed a little smile sideways at him. "He won't need sutures, because my chakra does the work. It's just a much more efficient mode of healing."

The boy watched his arm turn green and looked up at Naruto in concern. Naruto said nothing. He stepped forward, positioning himself directly across from Sakura, and wrapped his hand reassuringly around the boy's other arm. He had no idea what Sakura was talking about. But that other guy sure as hell did.

"Amazing," Akira exhaled. His eyes darted to Sakura's face for a moment. "You have developed quite the technique here. Are they implementing it in the hospital yet?"

Sakura bit her lip. "They've started to, but really I'm more interested in using it in the field. In battle situations it could save a lot of lives."

Akira drew a breath, deeply impressed. "And I get to learn from the master." Sakura laughed quietly. "May I try?"

"Of course. I'd hoped you might want to." Sakura pulled her hands back, but they stayed close.

Akira flattened his hands over the wound and summoned his chakra. A deeper color than Sakura's grass-green healing light, his chakra wrapped around the boys arm before pulling back to cloak just his fingers. He pushed and pulled at the chakra, kneading it until he found the right pulsing rhythm.

"Wow, it's a lot harder than it looks," Akira said, but the distraction broke his focus. Sakura nodded slowly and repositioned his hands while he concentrated on catching the rhythm again.

"There…you're getting it now," she said, to which he responded with a breathy, "Yeah, I can feel it…."

Naruto watched them with a scowl on his face, not bothering to conceal it. Why bother, they weren't looking at him. Their faces, _too_ close together, were even lit in the same green chakra. They were sharing things, things that Naruto had never known and had no way of knowing. Her work at the hospital was a mystery to him. It was just something she did. Something extra from her real work of being a shinobi. But now it sure seemed like _this_ was all she'd ever cared about—

"Is it— Is everything okay, Naruto-kun?" The boy looked up at Naruto in concern, mistaking Naruto's dark look for disapproval of how they were treating him.

"Huh?" Naruto looked down at the wide-eyed kid, momentarily confused. "Oh. Yeah. Everything's fine. I'm just watching _them_."

Sakura's shoulders stiffened at the tone of his voice, but no one else seemed to notice.

Akira looked up suddenly, astonished. "You're Naruto?! _The_ Naruto who saved our Kazekage?" The light at his hand stopped pulsing.

"Yeah," Naruto said darkly, "and if you don't watch what _your_ doing, _buddy_, I'm going to have to save him too."

Akira looked back to his hands but Sakura had already slid her under his, anticipating the dip in attention.

"No it's fine, I've got it," she bit off. But there was a frost in her voice that had nothing to do with Akira.

Akira straightened and looked from Sakura to Naruto in awe. "You two are heros in the Sand, you know that right?" Akira said. "I'm honored to finally meet you." He dipped his head for a bow. Naruto nodded slightly.

"To partner up like that, it was really something. You Leaf nins really are extraordinary." Akira smiled around, bowing quickly to each of them, who in turn all warmed under his praise. All except Naruto.

"And Leaf medics too," Akira said, turning back to Sakura. "That goes without saying, of course."

Sakura never looked up, but she smiled, acknowledging him, actually grateful for the levity in what would otherwise have been a miserable situation. She inspected her healing, applied a salve to the shuriken scrape on his calf, which turned out to be more surface wound than gouge, and reached for a bandage.

"She's a shinobi," Naruto corrected in a gruff voice. Sakura's fingers stilled on the bandage. He was itching for a fight, she could hear it in his voice.

"Oh I know," Akira said, "I've heard all about her amazing work in the field, how she teamed with you and—"

"No. She's a shinobi first," Naruto declared sternly. "All that medic stuff came later."

Sakura leveled an icy glare at Naruto, anger eclipsing her heartbreak for once. He stared back, head cocked to the side as if daring her to deny it.

But it was Akira who broke the standoff. "You mean…you're a ninja _too_," he said to Sakura. "At the same time as being a medic?" Sakura's darted a glance back to Akira, caught off guard by the question. He smiled deeply. "I thought you just had some specialized training…but…but…. Wow!" He shook his head. "Both at the same time. Do you ever sleep?"

Sakura chuckled, but the muscle at Naruto's jaw jumped dangerously at the realization that his remark had backfired. Instead of backing this _newcomer_ off, he'd just handed him one more thing to admire Sakura for.

"I do sleep," Sakura said, smiling at the thought. "Although it was harder when I was younger, you know, juggling both." She looked down, overly occupied with wrapping gauze around the boy's arm, and added quietly, "but I'm more focused on being a medic now."

She took a cleansing breath, ran her fingers down the bandages making sure they were tight and fast, then looked into the boy's face. "All better?"

He moved his arm gingerly, testing it out. "Y-Yeah, it really is" he nodded enthusiastically, looking at his arm in amazement like it was a new toy he couldn't wait to try out.

The mop-headed kid reminded her forcefully of Naruto at that age, and it brought a smile to her face, in spite of the regrets attached to those memories now.

"Good" she said, tousling his hair as she had always done to Naruto growing up.

The kid swung his legs of the bed and Sakura straightened just in time to catch a pained expression flicker over Naruto's face. He'd been watching her. Perhaps he thought the same thing. But in the next instant, he shuttered away whatever emotion he felt and helped the boy off the bed.

Akira turned to Sakura. "You Leaf nins really do blow me away." But it was clear there was only one Leaf nin he was talking about.

Sakura laughed off the compliment. "You say that now, but wait till the end of our shift! We have a lot more to do today—"

If Naruto heard then he didn't let on. He was busy nodding as the boy showed him his arm. Naruto guided him out the door and never looked back.

Sakura watched him disappear around the doorway and felt a familiar emptiness rush in. It always accompanied the bitter reality that she didn't know when she would see him again now that they were no longer…friends. Team 8 stepped forward to say their thankyous while they filed out, and Sakura was glad for the chance to smother those stray feelings behind professionalism

Kiba lingered at the door behind Hinata and Shino. "Thanks, Sakura," he said, his brown eyes soft and sympathetic.

It surprised her until she realized it was because he had been there the day of her terrible confession in the snow. When Naruto rejected her. Only Kiba knew, even in part, the bitter chain of events that had driven Team 7 apart. But the truth was things had gone wrong between her and Naruto long before Sasuke returned.

Kiba patted her on the arm bracingly and waved once to Akira. Sakura gulped past the sudden knot in her throat and forced her lips into a smile, and told herself to be grateful for the small things: Caring friends, a busy workload, and — she turned back to Akira — a smiling face to share it with.

Sakura repeated Tsunade's words in her head, about trying to go a different direction. Well, she was, dammit. At least, she was _trying_ to.

She picked up her clipboard, and with a perky attitude she didn't feel, said, "Let's go see who else in on the docket, shall we?"

Akira nodded firmly. His enthusiasm was a steadier, less boisterous version than Naruto's but it was no less intense. "Yep, I really want to get the hang of your technique. I think it's…." He searched for the right word. "Revolutionary. It's applications are endless."

Sakura's mouth hitched up into an honest smile. "I'm glad you think so." Medics didn't have teammates, but if they did, she figured Akira would be the closest thing to one she'd ever known.

"Come on, let's go." Sakura flipped off the light and closed the door.

* * *

If the hospital visit was uncomfortable, then it only got worse for Naruto. Because he saw her and her new team, he grit his teeth at the thought, a lot after that. She was out all over Konoha, leading the group of Sand medics to training areas, going over the types of wounds they might handle and the types of situations they should be ready for. It seemed like he was running into her everywhere.

Sakura did not wear her hospital scrubs for those outings, either. Standing amongst the white-clad medics, she was always in the center wearing full battle gear. With gloves on, kunais strapped to her thigh, shurikens hooked at her waist, her med-pack bulging and her clipboard in her hand, she looked ridiculously formidable.

One afternoon Naruto caught sight of her down the lane as he went to train with Team 8, and it stopped him in his tracks. He'd forgotten what she looked like in her fatigues, and something shifted in his chest. He missed her. She was laughing and talking. The sun was shining directly down making a halo on her pink hair and glinting off her weapons. It was the way she had looked for most of their lives together. Except now she was without him.

"Looks like she's in her element," Kiba said, cutting his eyes at Naruto. Kiba knocked him with his elbow as he passed, but Naruto didn't move. He stood in the road and watched the group for a moment.

Naruto saw the taller one, the one she was with at the hospital, standing opposite her. He gave her his full attention. And Naruto couldn't ignore the way he watched her. Sakura probably didn't realize how beautiful she was.

Naruto bit his lip, realizing just how effortlessly that thought had bubbled up. But he couldn't bring himself to take it back. It was the truth. She was beautiful. He'd always thought so. But somewhere along the way, he'd forgotten. Strange….

The tall one said something directly to her and she laughed. He smiled with her, eyes on her, clearly taking pleasure from what pleased her.

Naruto hated him.

Grinding his heel hard in the dirt, Naruto turned away and left the lane, even as the pleasant ripple of Sakura's laughter still rang in his ears.

* * *

Sakura spent every waking hour with the Sand team, spending just about as much time out of the hospital as she did in it. They developed a rapport Sakura had never had with the other nurses, doctors and staff.

With the focus on learning field medicine, Sakura put them through a sort of shinobi academy crash course. Lessons were tailored specifically to what the medics would need to know in order to effectively heal on the battlefield. They were talented and bright, quick learners who valued everything Sakura taught them. It was pleasure to be with them, and Sakura really felt like they were a team.

And when they weren't working, Sakura took them around to popular eateries and hang-out spots for more off-hours team-building.

She never worried about running into Naruto and his new "team" — she had such a long streak of not seeing him, it simply didn't occur to her that she might. But one night, that streak ended.

Sakura's group was seated at one of long yakiniku booths when Team 8 strolled in. Sakura held her breath but, sure enough, Naruto walked in behind them.

Team 8 waved and Naruto, caught in a moment of surprise, nodded sharply before turning away. But through some unfortunate twist of fate, they were seated only a few tables over in direct eyeline of Sakura's group.

Sakura realized with some dissatisfaction that it felt like the mood of the evening had radically changed. She knew it was only for her. But for the first time, she thought it might have been better if Naruto stayed away. Or if she stayed away from him. It was a depressing thought, but she would definitely be having a better time right now.

Under hooded lashes, she peeked over to see him frowning thunderously at a menu. A crease formed between her eyebrows. _What's he looking for? He's been here a hundred times and always gets the same thing_.

He's changed, she reminded herself. She didn't know _what_ he liked anymore.

Sakura dared another glance. The pendant lights over the tables of this restaurant had always made his hair look particularly golden. Like he was more angel than demon. Instead of a little bit of both. She smiled inwardly. She had forgotten.

Sakura looked back to her own plate and sighed in exasperation at herself. She had to move on.

When she raised her face, she did her best to rally. She spoke about all kinds of medical topics to the Sand team, and they were very interested in stories of her adventures.

After a particularly humorous story of some first-time field healing gone wrong (she'd misunderstood her patient's pain and "healed" a limb that didn't need healing, requiring both legs to be worked on instead of just the one), everyone chuckled to themselves and tucked into another plate of food. All except Akira, sitting beside to her, who turned and bent his head next to hers.

"Isn't that your teammate over there," he asked. Sakura noticed that his voice just low enough to not to draw the attention of anyone else at the table.

She swept an involuntary glance at Naruto, then flashed a brittle smile back to Akira. "Oh. Yes, I think I did see him come in earlier."

Akira nodded slowly, but when Sakura didn't say anything else, instead becoming overly interested in chasing a carrot around the plate with her chopsticks, he nudged her arm.

"Did you two…uh…have a falling out?" There was more than polite interest in his grey eyes, but it wasn't unkind.

Sakura shrugged, which she supposed spoke volumes just by itself. She put the chopsticks down and wiped her mouth on the napkin.

"Um, no…not really," she fibbed. Akira raised an eyebrow, then, knowing she was caught, clarified. "It's more like we're just, uh…going in different directions right now."

Akira laughed quietly. "I'm not sure _he_ knows that."

"W-What do you mean?"

"Well, he's kept his eye on you all night." His mouth curved into a boyish, crooked smile. "And he looks like he'd like to throttle _me_."

Sakura snorted at the thought and took a sip of her drink. But she cut her eyes surreptitiously over the edge of her glass. When she did, she locked eyes with Naruto.

The instant of shock at being caught quickly froze into an icy glare on his part. He turned away quickly and faced his table. Sakura looked openly at the line of his back and sighed.

"I'm sorry," Akira said earnestly. "I know what that's like. I dated my med-corps partner when I was in med school. We had a good time, but when it ended, things were uncomfortable for a while."

"Really," Sakura said, turning back to him in surprise. "But it got better?"

"Yeah," Akira said warmly. "We went our separate ways. 'Different directions' like you said, and eventually it got better. We're not best friends, but it isn't weird any more. We both wish each other the best."

Sakura looked back at Naruto. He had turned just enough so she could see his profile. He didn't look happy. His hair still looked golden and angelic under the light, and her fingers still ached to ruffle it and bring out more of the fox in him, like she had always done when they came here…together.

She stamped out the traitorous thought and turned back to Akira. "Hmm. That's good to hear." She looked up with a small smile. "Really good, actually."

"Just give it some time." He bumped his shoulder to hers. "It will work itself out."

Sakura sipped her drink and blinked suddenly, replaying the words in her head. This was exactly the advice Tsunade had given her. Maybe it was time she trusted in it.

She set her drink down. Akira smiled at her encouragingly. It was crooked and honest and…well, handsome. He was easy to be around. He wasn't the same as Naruto, or Sasuke or Sai for that matter, but he made her feel better. She felt like he understood the person she was _now_.

And maybe she should trust in that too.

She curled her hair back behind her ears, thinking. It had been a bit of an excuse before, but this time she really would try to go in a different direction. She'd focus on being the best med-nin she could be and developing her theories as far as she could. And she wouldn't worry about anything else.

Sakura turned back to the table and gave the team her full attention.

* * *

The remainder of the Sand team's time in Konoha flew by. And Sakura found that as the days wound down, she was reluctant to let them go. She had spent six weeks with them. And they had come to be quite formidable.

They even went out with a few teams to experience what it was like to be on a mission. But she never let them go out with Naruto and Team 8. She took Akira's advice to heart and wanted to move on.

Whether Naruto noticed or not she did not know. After that night at the restaurant, she didn't see him again. Although, to be honest, she tried her hardest not to look for him. Occasionally she saw a flash of yellow hair, but that was it.

It was Akira who first made the suggestion, and that the rest of the team heartily agreed with him, that she should come back with them to the Sand. Just for a little while. Travel back with them and stay to help establish a field medic corp in their village. Maybe this time she could even stay a few months. They still had so much to learn from her. And the Sand village was beautiful in the winter, after all.

Flattered at the idea, Sakura smiled and dismissed it. But the more they asked, hinted and cajoled, the more she warmed up to it. And before the last week was up, she approached Tsunade to ask for permission to go.

Tsunade, however, was much less enthusiastic.

She drilled her red fingernails on the top of the desk. "I don't want to loose my best medic to the Sand!"

"It would only be for a little while, Tsunade-sama! A few weeks or months or—"

Tsunade leaned forward and arched an eyebrow. "And that good-looking medic has nothing to do with it?"

Sakura turned bright red. Tsunade made it worse by laughing at her.

"He's nice," Sakura stammered, "but he's not— I mean, _that's _not why I'm—"

Tsunade waved her off, clearly ribbing her. Then she got down to what could be expected in visiting another village, even in an ambassadorial position, for an extended period of time.

"Of course, the most important thing is that I don't want you going in response to you someone you're interested in…." Tsunade looked hard at her apprentice. "Or running from."

Sakura shooked her head emphatically. "No Tsunade-sama, none of that plays a factor in my decision to request a leave. I just have really tried to do what you advised." Tsunade pinched her eyebrows in confusion. "About finding a new direction, another purpose and all that," Sakura said.

"Oh, that. Well good." Tsunade dug around in her desk drawer for a spare scroll. "And how is all that working out?"

"Good," Sakura said brightly. "I feel better than ever about my work as a medic, and I feel like I'm really growing. The Sand have an interesting way of doing things and different tactics than I would think to use. But it's amazing how we all have a common interest in healing and learning the best techniques available, no matter where we are."

Tsunade smiled, unrolling a satisfactory scroll. "Spoken like a true medic…. But it's a little different for shinobis…."

Sakura shrugged. "I don't think I'm going in that direction anymore."

"Ah…. I see." Tsunade had begun to open the scroll, but she let it furl back on itself then clasped her fingers in her lap. "And what do your other teammates have to say about that?"

"Well, nothing, really. Sasuke, when he was here, said he didn't realize how hard I'd worked at being a medic."

"And Naruto?"

Sakura shrugged, trying valiantly to act casual. But the awfulness of the situation couldn't be hidden. No matter how careless she acted.

"He doesn't care," she said, voice sounding strained.

Tsunade sighed. "I had hoped he'd come around. I know it was hard on him after Sasuke returned. But he, of all people, would certainly miss _you_—"

Sakura flattened her lips into a grim line and shook her head.

"What did he say when you told him?"

Sakura looked at Tsunade like she was crazy. "When would I ever have the chance to tell him? I've seen him _twice_ in the last six months. He works so hard to avoid me, so…. I took the hint."

Tsunade frowned, perplexed. She moved a few scrolls to find the shinobi assignment list, ran her finger down the lines, then nodded in agreement. "Yes, he had been out of the village a great deal. Still, that doesn't sound like Naruto at all."

Sakura shrugged again, but tears were beginning to sting her eyes.

"Yeah, well it is." She swallowed thickly. "And I'm ok. I'm ok with all of it now. It's like what you said. I should just put all of it behind me and move on."

Tsunade shook her head like clearing a fog, unsure now if they were even having the same conversation. "Do you mean being a shinobi or your team? Or Naruto?"

"Naruto, of course. Akira said the same thing. That it's uncomfortable for a while, but eventually it gets better. It'll work itself out."

"And Akira is the Sand medic?" Tsunade said slowly.

Sakura nodded then continued, gaining a second wind. "I've felt better than I have in a long time. And I feel like I have a purpose again. Not just hiding out in the hospital. This has helped me get over him, and when Akira suggested I go back, to help with their shinobi, I thought it would be great. I could go, help out, learn more, and come back feeling like my old self again."

Tsunade pinched the bridge of her nose in confusion. "So _Akira_ wants you to come to the Sand. And you want to go for _you_, but also because it will help you get over…_Sasuke_?"

"No," Sakura said quietly. "Naruto."

"Sakura," Tsunade said warmly, a knowing smile wreathing her face, happy she could clear all of this up. "Naruto _adores_ you. I'm sure he's acted strangely lately, but it's only because he cares so much about you. Since I first met you three, I could tell that he—"

Tears spilled down Sakura's cheeks. She pressed a hand to her mouth, trying to hold in a small sob, and shook her head.

"Sakura, what on earth is this about? Of course he does—"

"No," she said emphatically. "He doesn't. I thought so too, but it's not like that at all. I was wrong."

Tsunade couldn't believe what she was hearing. "And has he said that? Have you actually spoken to him about this?"

Sakura nodded pitifully.

"Well," Tsunade thundered, "what did he say?"

Sakura rubbed her eyes with the back of her wrist. It was hard enough to live through it once, but having to repeat it was proving just as bad.

"Well," she sniffled, "I told him that I thought of him differently, that I cared for him differently…as _more_ than a teammate."

Tsunade's eyes were riveted to her. When she took too long to answer, Tsunade urged _"And…."_

"And he said—" Sakura scrubbed her hand down her face, recovering from the tears. "He told me I was lying to myself," she said somberly.

Tsunade blinked, shocked. "T-That was it?!"

"No. Then he told me he hated people who lied to themselves."

Tsunade rolled her eyes. "That _idiot._ So he said all this when you told him you _liked_ him?!"

Sakura laughed sadly. "I told him I _loved_ him."

"Oh Sakura," Tsunade breathed, her voice full of sympathy. "And you've been carrying all this around since then? Have you talked to anyone else about it?"

Sakura dashed fresh tears away and shook her head. "There was nothing to say. He didn't feel the same, so things just went on like they had before. I thought maybe once Sasuke came back it might change but…I guess not."

Tsunade sighed. "I had no idea. I wish you'd told me sooner. I'm so sorry. "

Sakura wiped her cheeks dry. "But I feel better now. Like I'm finally moving on from it. And I don't want to let it slip away."

"I understand. And Akira…."

Sakura shrugged. "He's nice and all that. But it's nicer talking to someone I have things in common with, who gets what I'm doing. Instead of hiding out at the hospital and dreading I might run into Naruto and Hinata's team somewhere."

"Are they—"

"No. I mean…I don't know," she scrunched up her face in frustration. "They just seem awfully…close."

Tsunade nodded sagely. "So what was that Naruto said…." She tapped a finger trying to remember. "Something about people changing? I remember thinking it was a strange thing to say at the time."

Now it was Sakura's turn to roll her eyes. "A while back, after Sasuke returned and Naruto first started acting weird, I told Naruto that sometimes people change. Sasuke was still trying to figure it all out. But even though someone acts one way in the past, it doesn't mean they'll always be like that."

"Oh," Tsunade said politely even though she didn't completely follow.

"I was talking about _me!_" Sakura thumped her finger on her chest in exasperation. "I was trying to tell him that whatever he thought I felt for Sasuke, I didn't. That _I_ had changed. And so had Sasuke."

"Ah. And what did he say to that?"

Sakura flung her hands in the air, laughing when she felt like crying. "He said that I was wrong. That if you loved someone, then that didn't change. And if you're a team, that shouldn't change either." She stopped suddenly and rubbed her hand across her forehead. "But now that I think about it, maybe we were talking about two entirely different things." She sighed. "What a mess."

Tsunade sighed as well.

"I just want a break from it all," Sakura said, dropping her hands to her side. "I can't figure any of it out. So I thought about what you said. About going my own direction. And I think this is it. Doing this, helping out the Sand medics, I feel like I'm making a difference. And I'm closer than ever to working out my healing techniques." She added quietly, "And Akira's been a great help in that as well."

Tsunade rolled out the scroll, dashed off several lines, the stamped it at the bottom. She handed it to Sakura, but didn't let go. "Don't run off with a Sand nin!" She smiled but there was steel in her voice. "I'm not giving my best medic to them." Then she released it.

Sakura looked over the scroll. A slow grin spread across her face.

"Consider it a loan," Tsunade said, pleased to see Sakura's characteristic brightness returning. "Is six-months enough?"

Sakura nodded heartily. "Thank you so much, Tsunade-sama!"

* * *

And before she knew it, Sakura was packing her things and preparing for her journey. She said goodbye to Ino, Kakashi and a few others, wrote a note to Sasuke, but generally did not make a big deal of it.

She didn't leave word for Naruto. She wanted to, but she couldn't seem to find the right words. And he certainly didn't have trouble leaving her behind whenever her missions came up. So she let that make the decision for her.

And without any fanfare except the smiling faces of the other medics, Akira's the brightest among them, Sakura quietly slipped out of the gates of Konoha and left for the Sand.

* * *

**Author's Notes**

Thanks for the reviews and faves guys! Sorry I've fallen off my posting sched a bit. Life has gotten busy! :) Hope you enjoyed this chapter. A jealous Naruto is so much fun to write! (Although he can't admit to himself yet why he is jealous...and what he has to do about it!) So this chapter explores a little of what might have happened if, after Sakura's confession, they returned to the village and she had to go on like it never happened. Only a few people would know (Kiba, for one), and Sakura would have to go around pretending everything was fine. So I've said this is a little like a highschool romance in where there's drama, hurt feelings, immaturity and really, everything would be cleared up with some level-headed communication — and Sakura's discussion with Tsunade falls into the same category. Lots of fics show Tsunade, Jiraiya, Kakashi, etc., as having inside knowledge of Naruto and Sakura's feelings. But really, most times, the "grown-ups" have no idea who likes whom. And they're more incline to step back than get involved. Tsunade is of this camp, functioning like a teacher or hs principle who's just trying to give some good life advice to the kids she likes. She's not hanging them out to dry, but she's definitely no matchmaker. Anyway, this chapter was Sakura-centric, but next one switches to Naruto. Please read and review!

Oh, and next Voice in the Wind chapter is coming... Get ready for it... :)


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